my needs ...

I need a companionship with another. I like the dynamics of two. It is much easier to feel like a team. Forget groups. The bigger the mass the more I blend in with the walls.

I need approval and praise in what I sweat hard at like my dreams and passion and any kind of work I do. I feed off this kind of energy and end up bend over backwards to give more and be better. When days go by with no appreciation coming my way, it is very easy to give up. I said days when in many areas of my life it has been years of drought.

I need people to be patient with my speech. My mind goes faster then the connection between my head and mouth or my brain goes into picture mode and I find it difficult to speak in picture when I need to draw out visuals. Try giving map directions over the phone. I bet it is hilarious to watch me!

I need to be allowed to be deep. I do over think but there is a lot of creative process going on. I never thought I was smart until recently when someone said I was! I was shocked. My grades never proved it. I do need to learn to have fun with my depth. I really need to have a companion who will allow me to learn the art of conversation and I hate to say this but a safe confrontation. I seriously don't know how to do it and come out of it still intact. Usually I am broken and beaten up. I hate competition and I need a feeling of true teamwork.

I need balance and I find that I really need to have my creative side blossom so that I can handle the mundane and ordinary days. I need a zing of excitement or learning because if I get to bored, I can become quite grouchy and nasty.

I wonder how God's list of my needs compare to my list...
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