Thursday's morning drive into work rewarded me with brilliant soft yellow white sun rays shining through moody blue clouds. Moving south I enjoy the warmth of sunrise on my left cheek. It is like being kissed by God. Turning east my eyes glaze in awe of His Masterful Artwork! I had to capture a few clicks to sear it into my memory. Its a feast for my soul as I start a work day.
This Thursday was going to end differently than just another day in and day out. The news I was to receive & process was going make this morning's sunrise a little bit more permanently etched on my soul. At 11:15AM my cousin Jim walked onto Heaven's shores. What? He's only four years older than I! Just should not be!
This Thursday waves of childhood memories flooded my daydreams & my tears released emotions that I could not speak. My cousins are all older than I except one so I generally was in awe of them. I'm finding myself pausing here as the memories again like snapshots flick across my mind. Grandma L kept showing up. My heart bubbled up just thinking of a young Grandma waiting there on Heaven's shores with arms wide open to receive Jim in a ferocious hug right after Jesus. Oh, how I have tears because of this earthly loss! Oh, how my heart aches for his wife's loss & for the son who lost his dad too soon! But behind this pain is a Joy inexpressible!
Being born into the Family of God gives me such an uncontainable & unmeasurable Assurance that death has truly lost its sting. Oh, it still hurts here & its work to keep setting Jesus ever before me when the world does its best to drown Him out.
As another morning dawned, God's Word did too. The Divine Author pens in word pictures that this student leans in for more. Proverb 4:18 says "the path of the Righteous is like the first gleam of morning sun, shining ever brighter till the full light of day." Remembering the previous day's sunrise & remembering Jim, family twice over, I began to fuse these two pictures together...
Always before I stopped the picture at the sunrise because sunrises can be so dramatic with its God-Fingers slicing through the shadows of the trees. Full light of day was like the show was over. I just hadn't fused the two pictures together correctly.
The first gleam of dawn pierces through the shadows & clouds. Isn't that just how it is with the Righteous? God's Sonlight pierces right through our shadows of sin, pain, sadness, & darkness. As a child of God grows more & more like Jesus, the child shines ever brighter. The full light of day came for Jim as he walked onto Heaven's shore. We've seen the special effects so we have an idea but Jim knows full well. The full Light of day consumes all the sin, pain, sadness, & darkness. No more shadows. No more sad tears. No more falling short. No more struggle. The brilliant soft yellow white once gleam is full light so bright for Jim. Its exciting to see new believers grow as Jesus gleams through them but oh, as believers gathers days & years, the shadows seems to grow longer & longer, believers yearn & ache for the God's Perfecting Work in them & for those promising Golden Shores. Full Light of Day.
I will always delight in God's beautiful sunrises but there will be no stopping there for me. I will relish the Light!
When we all get to Heaven
What a day of Rejoicing that will be
When we all see Jesus
We'll sing & shout the Victory!
I'm starting the Rejoicing early...
Salvation =
new creation
Family
a sure Strength
purpose
Victory over death
Heaven
Jesus Christ our Groom
Union
reunions
JOY overload & beyond measure
Showing posts with label everlasting life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label everlasting life. Show all posts
Saturday, April 29, 2017
Monday, December 15, 2014
to carry a little life ...
I am a story collector. I am a story keeper. I like to listen to someone's story. I like to understand what makes them tick, what makes them smile, and what makes them sad. I am emotionally vested. It is treasure in the raw. I have a vast library of stories and as I think stories begin to come together and dots begin to connect and my thoughts enter into new territory. Often these stories are kept within my library for my own pondering but sometimes the story must be told...
I have a co-worker friend whose story has a similar vein as me and my nieces. She once opened up to tell me about her child that she miscarried. I have not experience this in my family sphere when she was telling me. My heart ripped for her as she stated that she often wonders about this child she will never know. Inside my heart I am screaming 'I will see this little one and you too can if you fellow Jesus'. I don't say it aloud. I want her to hear not shut me down. Maybe another time ...
Another story comes by a book. This child is a child with a lot of health problems and does not have many days on earth. As the story unfolds it is how the mother and father cope with the health issues and with not knowing how long they have with this precious little girl. I don't remember the title of the book. Some of the details are foggy. I am thinking the little girl's name started with an A like Angie or Angel. What I do remember well is the 'vision' the mother had. The mother was awake and this dream was of comfort. It was God surrounded with little children and He was telling them that He has parents who wanted a baby and He had a tough assignment. He wanted to see who was up for the challenge. He went through the list. Hands went up but then as the list got harder and harder, the hands weren't going up except for one. This little girl called Angie said she was willing to undergo all of the heath issues and limited days on earth. This is just a paraphrase and I so wish to find that book! But what I remembered most about this was how it comforted the mother to know that God had a purpose for this precious baby as well as for her and her husband. It changed the mother perspective and renewed her weary soul that if Angie could sign up for this hard challenge, she could be up for this challenge as well.
Another baby story comes from Joni Erickson Tada. Again I don't remember all the details but I do remember Joni saying that this mom knew that something was wrong with the baby and the baby wasn't going to live. The mom so determined to give this baby in her womb all her best and to be proud to have carry this baby as many days God would give. I was thinking wow..... to have presence of mind to be joyful and not wallow in grief and loss... I don't think I could do that.
Another story is King David's baby story. He lost a baby. He grieved and morned and prayed over the baby but when the baby died, he washed himself up and morned no more. The people around him wondered at this. King David's reply was that he could not bring the baby back but that he would go unto the baby meaning that when he died he would go unto this baby.
I've squirreled these stories away never knowing if I would ever need them. I am not a mother nor will I ever be one. I do have a mother instinct and vision so maybe some day I could use them....
News! My little brother and wife are having a baby.... lasted all of twelve weeks. The little one was the size of a blueberry. I was still in the process of accepting the idea of another pair of feet pattering around. A new personality to discover and enjoy. Gone. Never to know ... at least not here on this earth. Heaven and eternity though will be ours to know each other ... so hard to wrap my mind around. What comfort can I bring to my brother and his wife? I have these stories.... they are a comfort to me but how do I be a storyteller....?
I have a co-worker friend whose story has a similar vein as me and my nieces. She once opened up to tell me about her child that she miscarried. I have not experience this in my family sphere when she was telling me. My heart ripped for her as she stated that she often wonders about this child she will never know. Inside my heart I am screaming 'I will see this little one and you too can if you fellow Jesus'. I don't say it aloud. I want her to hear not shut me down. Maybe another time ...
Another story comes by a book. This child is a child with a lot of health problems and does not have many days on earth. As the story unfolds it is how the mother and father cope with the health issues and with not knowing how long they have with this precious little girl. I don't remember the title of the book. Some of the details are foggy. I am thinking the little girl's name started with an A like Angie or Angel. What I do remember well is the 'vision' the mother had. The mother was awake and this dream was of comfort. It was God surrounded with little children and He was telling them that He has parents who wanted a baby and He had a tough assignment. He wanted to see who was up for the challenge. He went through the list. Hands went up but then as the list got harder and harder, the hands weren't going up except for one. This little girl called Angie said she was willing to undergo all of the heath issues and limited days on earth. This is just a paraphrase and I so wish to find that book! But what I remembered most about this was how it comforted the mother to know that God had a purpose for this precious baby as well as for her and her husband. It changed the mother perspective and renewed her weary soul that if Angie could sign up for this hard challenge, she could be up for this challenge as well.
Another baby story comes from Joni Erickson Tada. Again I don't remember all the details but I do remember Joni saying that this mom knew that something was wrong with the baby and the baby wasn't going to live. The mom so determined to give this baby in her womb all her best and to be proud to have carry this baby as many days God would give. I was thinking wow..... to have presence of mind to be joyful and not wallow in grief and loss... I don't think I could do that.
Another story is King David's baby story. He lost a baby. He grieved and morned and prayed over the baby but when the baby died, he washed himself up and morned no more. The people around him wondered at this. King David's reply was that he could not bring the baby back but that he would go unto the baby meaning that when he died he would go unto this baby.
I've squirreled these stories away never knowing if I would ever need them. I am not a mother nor will I ever be one. I do have a mother instinct and vision so maybe some day I could use them....
News! My little brother and wife are having a baby.... lasted all of twelve weeks. The little one was the size of a blueberry. I was still in the process of accepting the idea of another pair of feet pattering around. A new personality to discover and enjoy. Gone. Never to know ... at least not here on this earth. Heaven and eternity though will be ours to know each other ... so hard to wrap my mind around. What comfort can I bring to my brother and his wife? I have these stories.... they are a comfort to me but how do I be a storyteller....?
Sunday, October 02, 2011
I know why I'm not a good speller...
You go about your life wondering why you struggle in an area. You see it at a negative. Nothing good will come from it. Until out of the blue God lets you in on the reason.
I love English. I enjoy a good story and a well crafted word picture. I am a poet. My best thoughts comes in by the eyes and through the brain and out through my fingers and onto a white blue lined paper or the white screen. I have a BA degree in English Education. However, my biggest struggle is the spelling. I can see the front letters and the caboose letters but in the middle they run together. Unfortunately, phonetics was not the trend of the day. I find it embarrassing in front of others. I love the dictionary though and I am not afraid to use it. I love the iMac and now the ios5 update for the ipod touch because the dictionary is right there at your finger tips and you don't have to run and lug out the dictionary. I have always meant to reteach myself in spelling but there are always more interesting things to do.
It was Saturday night and the curtain opens up on a scene where the church singles had gathered together for food (yuck), fun, and football (yuck). One of the girls was commenting on Mrs. So & So from the Ukraine that had written 'Couch So & So' instead of 'Coach So & So'. I could not believe my ears! Not only do I like Mrs. So & So, I consider her a rising friend of mine. First of all believers are not to make fun of other believers or others in general. I work out there in the world and I am tired of all the backbiting. Being with believers should be a place to relax and enjoy others. Second, my life has been filled with multicultural friends. My Vietnamese high school friend is always calling me asking me English questions. English is one of the hardest languages to learn. The rules are not always cut and dry. I went home quite upset about the comments. Then I realized why I am bad speller.
I am a quiet observer and a hearty listener. I know how to ask the questions. I ultimately want others to feel safe in my presence. I don't want them to hide. The real person is Eternal not some misspelled word.
I love English. I enjoy a good story and a well crafted word picture. I am a poet. My best thoughts comes in by the eyes and through the brain and out through my fingers and onto a white blue lined paper or the white screen. I have a BA degree in English Education. However, my biggest struggle is the spelling. I can see the front letters and the caboose letters but in the middle they run together. Unfortunately, phonetics was not the trend of the day. I find it embarrassing in front of others. I love the dictionary though and I am not afraid to use it. I love the iMac and now the ios5 update for the ipod touch because the dictionary is right there at your finger tips and you don't have to run and lug out the dictionary. I have always meant to reteach myself in spelling but there are always more interesting things to do.
It was Saturday night and the curtain opens up on a scene where the church singles had gathered together for food (yuck), fun, and football (yuck). One of the girls was commenting on Mrs. So & So from the Ukraine that had written 'Couch So & So' instead of 'Coach So & So'. I could not believe my ears! Not only do I like Mrs. So & So, I consider her a rising friend of mine. First of all believers are not to make fun of other believers or others in general. I work out there in the world and I am tired of all the backbiting. Being with believers should be a place to relax and enjoy others. Second, my life has been filled with multicultural friends. My Vietnamese high school friend is always calling me asking me English questions. English is one of the hardest languages to learn. The rules are not always cut and dry. I went home quite upset about the comments. Then I realized why I am bad speller.
I am a quiet observer and a hearty listener. I know how to ask the questions. I ultimately want others to feel safe in my presence. I don't want them to hide. The real person is Eternal not some misspelled word.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Call Upon Me
I am quite frustrated that the NYC mayor has decided to keep all religions out the 911 10th Anniversary Reflection Memorial. I do not mind all the religions part but the ultimate COST is the taking out of God and having a personal relationship with the Almighty in a great time of need.
Who better than God to call on when fire and destruction are licking at your heels? Why take Him out of the equation when He still can be found? What a disservice to our founding fathers and those who ran through the man made fire and hell here on earth and straight into the Mighty Arms of God because they had a personal relationship with the God of Salvation?
"For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You." Psalm 86:5
"Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.h Psalm 50:15
"The Lord is near to all who call upon Him, To all who call upon Him in truth." Psalm 145:18
"As for me, I will call upon God, And the Lord shall save me." Psalm 55:16
"Because He has inclined His ear to me, Therefore I will call upon Him as long as I live." Psalm 116:2
"He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him." Psalm 91:15
"Seek the Lord while He may be found, Call upon Him while He is near." Isaiah 55:6
What a sad day it is when we remember the tragic day but refuse to remember the God Most High with our trust and obedience.
"The Lord also will be a refuge for the oppressed, A refuge in times of trouble. And those who know Your name will put their trust in You; For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You." Psalm 9:9&10
what a way to go!
Whew! All the 911 stuff brings up a lot of feelings. A question has come to mind as I hear the stories all over again. If I had a hubby who called me to tell me good bye before he met the Lord, what would I say?
The answer comes quickly. Psalms 23 seems top on everyone's list but for me it would be Psalms 100. This particular Psalms gives such strength and gives you something constructive to do when chaos is raining down all around you and when you feel the fires heat bear down your neck and when you feel the foundations give way .....
Psalms 100
Make a joyful shout to the Lord, all you lands.
we are His people and the sheep of His pasture.
The answer comes quickly. Psalms 23 seems top on everyone's list but for me it would be Psalms 100. This particular Psalms gives such strength and gives you something constructive to do when chaos is raining down all around you and when you feel the fires heat bear down your neck and when you feel the foundations give way .....
Psalms 100
Make a joyful shout to the Lord, all you lands.
The battle is the Lord's. What is a joyful shout but a battle cry?
Serve the Lord with gladness;... even in difficult times, even in a blaze of fire, even when you storm the terrorist in a plane headed for the White House, even if you are all alone gasping for the next breath of air,...
come before His Presence with singing.Singing changes your brain for the better even if all you can get out is a few whimpering notes... He hears you. He is with you. He is singing over you. Can't you hear Him singing?
Know that the Lord, He is God; it is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;we are His people and the sheep of His pasture.
We were made by His Hand and He has plans for us. We are weak. He is strong. He is our Hope and all we have to do is trust and obey Him. What a Great Shepherd He is. We are NEVER EVER FORSAKEN! Keep marching onward!
Enter into His Gates with Thanksgiving, and into His Courts with Praise, be thankful to Him, and bless His Holy Name.If is time to go on into Glory what better way to do so than with thanksgiving when meeting God face to face. If is time to stay here and come before Him in prayer and all is taken from my hand, it is His plan not my own and I will come before Him and thank Him for what I did have and will wait upon the Lord for what is and is to come.
For the Lord is good; His Mercy is everlasting, and His Truth endures to all generations.Yes, the kids will know not only their earthy father but their Heavenly Father as well. God is both Protector and Provider. We shall meet again. I have the memories. We serve and love the One True God. Those who come behind us will know of our love for each other but more importantly for our Lord and Master.
The visuals are overloading my mind as I step into the 'shoes'. I am sure the emotions would be raw and the cracks would be in my voice but what strength I find in Psalms 100 and would want to give it out to my loved ones whether or not it was me facing the my final (finest) hours or it was my loves ones.
O to enter HIS GATES a shouting!!!!! with all the JOY within me bursting out of all my seams! What a way to go!!!!
Monday, September 05, 2011
keep the faith ...
Our new church of a year has celebrated its 175th birthday yesterday. Hearing all the cool history was great and seeing it was cool. This was back before Abraham Lincoln was known. There was a 200 year old Bible from one of the members that was written in Old English. WOW!! As I was taking it all in a whisper kept calling me so much so that I had to tell it here.
~~~ Huge photos of yesteryear blown up huge on either side of me on walls. The eyes are drawing me in and I am trying to hear what they are trying to say to me. Can you hear what they are saying? Could it be the same thing the early church said and echos through the channels of history?
"Keep the faaaaaaith.... Keeeeep the faaaaaaith ..... keeeeeep the faith..... KEEP THE FAITH! Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap a harvest if we faint not. " Galatians 6:9 ~~~
I know a bit "Dead Poet's Society" but that was what I was hearing inside my head. Matthew 24 has been on my mind lately. All around me I see the Love growing cold and it makes me shiver inside. I don't know how are young are going to survive!
Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Matthew 24:12&13
What a tall order in these days but I must keep the faith. I must keep the love. I must keep the gratitude. I want that crown of JOY. I want those behind me to see His Path.... and want His Love for themselves....
~~~ Huge photos of yesteryear blown up huge on either side of me on walls. The eyes are drawing me in and I am trying to hear what they are trying to say to me. Can you hear what they are saying? Could it be the same thing the early church said and echos through the channels of history?
"Keep the faaaaaaith.... Keeeeep the faaaaaaith ..... keeeeeep the faith..... KEEP THE FAITH! Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap a harvest if we faint not. " Galatians 6:9 ~~~
I know a bit "Dead Poet's Society" but that was what I was hearing inside my head. Matthew 24 has been on my mind lately. All around me I see the Love growing cold and it makes me shiver inside. I don't know how are young are going to survive!
Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. Matthew 24:12&13
What a tall order in these days but I must keep the faith. I must keep the love. I must keep the gratitude. I want that crown of JOY. I want those behind me to see His Path.... and want His Love for themselves....
Monday, March 14, 2011
His Wing...
My alarm radio popped on and after a hymn, the news blared on about the earthquake and pending tsunami hitting Japan. It's the BIG one. I was reminding myself that it was only Friday and I had to get to work after taking off for a funeral the day before. I reached over to my new bedside bookcase and took "Come Away My Beloved" by Francine J Roberts. I read her chapter 'Stay Beneath My Wing.' Perfect!
"Thus saith the Lord to His people: Shall I create, and shall I not have it in My power to distort? Is it not written that the potter breaketh one vessel that He may shape a new one? Shall I not do likewise? Yea, I shall bring My Will to pass, and man shall know that his will is as a broken straw when pitted against the Almighty.
But My people shall know the protection of their God. Because their heart is stayed upon Jehovah, therefore shall I keep them in My pavilion and shelter them until the calamity be overpassed.
If I removed thee from the scene, ye would have no testimony of My miraculous delivering power. Stay beneath My Wings, and I shall make thee as a tower of strength to which the fearful may run and find safety."
"When though passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee; when though walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be harmed; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. "
Isaiah 43:2
As I began my dialogue with God, I asked if the Hymn would play. Wouldn't you know? "Under His Wings" the hymn played on BBNRadio.org as I hurried to work.
Under His Wings
Under His wings I am safely abiding,
Though the night deepens and tempests are wild,
Still I can trust Him; I know He will keep me,
He has redeemed me, and I am His child.
Refrain
Under His wings, under His wings,
Who from His love can sever?
Under His wings my soul shall abide,
Safely abide forever.
Under His wings, what a refuge in sorrow!
How the heart yearningly turns to His rest!
Often when earth has no balm for my healing,
There I find comfort, and there I am blessed.
Refrain
Under His wings, oh, what precious enjoyment!
There will I hide till lifefs trials are ofer;
Sheltered, protected, no evil can harm me,
Resting in Jesus, Ifm safe evermore.
Refrain
Words: William O. Cushing, 1896.
Music: Ira D. Sankey
My heart is heavy as I hear the tweets from DownUnder. 'Queensland's floods, Victoria's floods, Christchurch earthquake, Japan's earthquake and tsunami with pending nuclear catastrophe just in the matter of three months of 2011. Is the world coming to the end?' Then there is such unrest in the Middle East that set my teeth on edge. Within the church I am hearing the last days are near. It is an unspoken 'Heaven in '11?'
Are you ready? What will it take to convince you that you need Jesus? Is there a lost soul you want to see in Heaven? Is there a dream you want answered yes before He calls you home? Are lost and overwhelmed by everything around you? Have you lost everything? How long are you going to hold on this world with a death grip? How much discontent and turmoil can you take?
Oh, how this world makes you crave and crave without filling. Only Jesus Christ can satisfy our hunger. Come. Ask Him to be your Savior and let Him cover you under His Wing.
"When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm. Selah."
Psalms 75:3
Postscript:
Friday night when I could sit in front of the news and use google earth to pinpoint where our Japanese missionary family were located, I was horrified to see that they lived in Sendai right where the epicenter of this quake happened. This was a big jolt of geography! I am happy to report that the family are ok. That is all I know. My prayer is for thus family to be a light and strength to those around them. I am also praying for the parents of a blogger I know who are missionaries in Japan as well...
Monday, January 24, 2011
He has not abhorred the afflicted ...
When I struggle with the stuff of life, I like to find something from God's word to hold onto. Last year it had been cancer and five days into the new year a co-worker died from leukemia. This one was different because I don't know where she will be for eternity.
My thoughts were troubled as I heard the country pastor give the plan of salvation at her funeral and I wondered how many ears where closed. My heart harbors a hope for a co-worker to know my Savior.
I have seen the ravages of cancer plague human body. I can't help but see this short lived affliction as a small taste of hell with its long term torment of body, mind, heart, and soul. This alone would drive me to my Savior but to most this is just a silly notion.
Getting back to finding Scripture to carry in my heart, I usually pause when I find a crying out from misery and suffering like what you find in Job and the Psalms. I was reading Psalms 22 on Kindle where it is a fresh copy with no personal notes to remind me of past gleanings. Here was a horrific lament to the Heavenly Father. What torture did this poor soul went through at the hands of mere men. I could see cancer here in a human form. However, I was stopped in a silent gasp as I read that this was my Jesus that was crying out. What peace I know as Jesus has traveled here. If He went through all of this while His Heavenly Father looked away because He carried my ugly sin, I can carry this Scripture close and walk hand in hand with the Nail Pierced One knowing that this can't take me from Him. I want others to know this Great Love too.
"The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; Do not be discouraged."
~ Deut. 31:8
Are you feeling it? You want it? You can.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
strengthen by Him ...
Another believer died last Friday morning from pancreatic cancer. She is a wife and grandmother. Her husband is a big man but this is rocking him to the core. His tummy jiggles as the tears well up and his lip quivers. I have been praying hard that he finds Jesus Christ as the reason to get out of bed each day....
I am going back to II Timothy 4 for more encouragement. "At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that is may not be laid to their charge. But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me, so that the message might be preached fully through me, and that all the Gentiles might hear. Also I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion. And the Lord will deliver me from every evil work and preserve me for His Heavenly Kingdom. To Him be Glory forever and ever. Amen!" (verses 16-18) I saw this through one sick in bed but as these dear loved ones go into the Arms of Jesus, you have to see these verses through the ones left behind. If they can go on with the hearts ripped out but stand strengthened by the Great Comforter, what a message is being preached through the their songs over the storms.
I have been focusing a lot on cancer and carry through it. I am wore out. I have found myself thanking the Lord for the best gift ever - everlasting life. I am sooooo grateful that I have a God who loves me and will never leave me at my defenses. God stands with me and strengthens me!!!!! Now that is pretty AWESOME!
I am going back to II Timothy 4 for more encouragement. "At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that is may not be laid to their charge. But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me, so that the message might be preached fully through me, and that all the Gentiles might hear. Also I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion. And the Lord will deliver me from every evil work and preserve me for His Heavenly Kingdom. To Him be Glory forever and ever. Amen!" (verses 16-18) I saw this through one sick in bed but as these dear loved ones go into the Arms of Jesus, you have to see these verses through the ones left behind. If they can go on with the hearts ripped out but stand strengthened by the Great Comforter, what a message is being preached through the their songs over the storms.
I have been focusing a lot on cancer and carry through it. I am wore out. I have found myself thanking the Lord for the best gift ever - everlasting life. I am sooooo grateful that I have a God who loves me and will never leave me at my defenses. God stands with me and strengthens me!!!!! Now that is pretty AWESOME!
Saturday, October 09, 2010
a Race or a Battle?
How to die from cancer or some prolonged death has been twirling around in my mind of late. (My prayer list has too many with cancer...) It is often said 'I am going to beat this thing' or 'She lost her battle with cancer.' As a believer I shutter at these words and I began to question why this wasn't sitting right with me.
In Ephesians 6:10-18 it tells us to put on the full armor of God. Why? To make a stand against the devil's schemes. This is the battle not cancer. The battle is about good vs. evil. Everlasting Life vs. everlasting death. It about keeping our faith sure and strong. No wavering. For our battle is not against flesh and blood! Doesn't this mean our battle is not against sickness or death? Cancer is a beast and so very unforgiving. We feeble humans fight cancer with poison! How whacked out is that? I just want rip at my heart and scream on the top of lungs... that is how much I feel about this.
I always need a picture to deal with life's hardships and how I am to behave as a believer. So if cancer isn't the battle what is it? and how do I deal with it victoriously? I see it like in II Timothy 4:6-8. Cancer should be a race. Well, to clarify it even more, life is a race. Cancer would be a bend or the steep incline or a chapter in the race. It is not how fast but it about the endurance. It is seeing yourself running and there in the stands are others who have endure the what you have gone through. There are family members and friends who are praying for you and holding you before God. These are the witnesses like Isaiah 43:12 talks about. ("You are My witnesses," declares the Lord "that I AM God.") I like looking up into those stands because others have endured bring Glory to God and so can I. I also have ones that are coming behind me. I must be a good witness for them. (I use this in my singleness too.) I don't focus on the stands rather that is in side vision because my focus is on the finish line where my Lord and Master is waiting with outstretched BARE Arms to welcome me. Ah, what a bear hug that will be. I smile and if there are tears it is tears of JOY. Yes, I sorrow because I am stuck here with all those human feelings of loss but I have the promise of EVERLASTING LIFE. I am all good!!!!
Paul says "For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the Crown of Righteous, which the Lord, the Righteous Judge, will reward to me on that day- and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for His Appearing." ~II Timothy 4:6-8 AMEN!!!!
We have two frontlines as a believer. The battle of faith and the race of life. I feel we must keep a clear perspective of both and not mix up the sickness as the battle. Our battle is against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil .... anything that would rob us of living purely and strongly for God.
No matter what you think or even if you think a bit off my rocker, the battle is the Lord's and He is the Strong Man. Here is another picture I love... 'How can anyone enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can rob his house. He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters.' Matt 12:29-30 See Jesus Christ is my Strong Man. I send Him to the door. I know I am safe with Him..... I will not be tied up. I will run free straight into His Arms. Praise Yahweh.....
In Ephesians 6:10-18 it tells us to put on the full armor of God. Why? To make a stand against the devil's schemes. This is the battle not cancer. The battle is about good vs. evil. Everlasting Life vs. everlasting death. It about keeping our faith sure and strong. No wavering. For our battle is not against flesh and blood! Doesn't this mean our battle is not against sickness or death? Cancer is a beast and so very unforgiving. We feeble humans fight cancer with poison! How whacked out is that? I just want rip at my heart and scream on the top of lungs... that is how much I feel about this.
I always need a picture to deal with life's hardships and how I am to behave as a believer. So if cancer isn't the battle what is it? and how do I deal with it victoriously? I see it like in II Timothy 4:6-8. Cancer should be a race. Well, to clarify it even more, life is a race. Cancer would be a bend or the steep incline or a chapter in the race. It is not how fast but it about the endurance. It is seeing yourself running and there in the stands are others who have endure the what you have gone through. There are family members and friends who are praying for you and holding you before God. These are the witnesses like Isaiah 43:12 talks about. ("You are My witnesses," declares the Lord "that I AM God.") I like looking up into those stands because others have endured bring Glory to God and so can I. I also have ones that are coming behind me. I must be a good witness for them. (I use this in my singleness too.) I don't focus on the stands rather that is in side vision because my focus is on the finish line where my Lord and Master is waiting with outstretched BARE Arms to welcome me. Ah, what a bear hug that will be. I smile and if there are tears it is tears of JOY. Yes, I sorrow because I am stuck here with all those human feelings of loss but I have the promise of EVERLASTING LIFE. I am all good!!!!
Paul says "For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the Crown of Righteous, which the Lord, the Righteous Judge, will reward to me on that day- and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for His Appearing." ~II Timothy 4:6-8 AMEN!!!!
We have two frontlines as a believer. The battle of faith and the race of life. I feel we must keep a clear perspective of both and not mix up the sickness as the battle. Our battle is against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil .... anything that would rob us of living purely and strongly for God.
No matter what you think or even if you think a bit off my rocker, the battle is the Lord's and He is the Strong Man. Here is another picture I love... 'How can anyone enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can rob his house. He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters.' Matt 12:29-30 See Jesus Christ is my Strong Man. I send Him to the door. I know I am safe with Him..... I will not be tied up. I will run free straight into His Arms. Praise Yahweh.....
Saturday, August 21, 2010
a day of rejoicing is coming ...
I walked into the hospital room knowing that she was nearing this life's finish line. The cancer was too beastly and too fast. She did open her eyes and spoke in very soft tones. She asked for water and I offer it to her but in the middle of her very slow first sip, her eyes closed like she dozed off. She is in a lot of pain and is on some heavy pain meds. I did hold her hand before the nurse came in to change the clear bags hanging beside her. Her husband encouraged me to talk to her but I found myself falling silent.
The woman in this bed is about 8 years older than me. She is in my childhood memories. I remember her and her sisters baby-sitting me and my brother. They had two cute black and white bull dogs called Moses and Sarah. They lived on a farm and I loved their farm house. I haven't seen her sense. My mom works at the hospital on a floor where a lot of cancer patients go when they are having a major battle with cancer and need hospital care. I happened to call mom about a birthday matter coming up and she said our family friend was back in the hospital and it was not good. I told mom I would come up.
I am sensitive and I try to put my feet in other's shoes. I knew her kids where teenagers and I can help but wonder how these kids were going to cope in the days and years ahead. This beautiful woman has a beautiful husband who talked to me so I began to ask him questions learning more about his family and even finding common bonds like going to the same college. The youngest son was playing football that night. The middle son is marrying and coming home from Chicago this month. The oldest has graduated from college and as a teaching job. She hasn't found love in college and there isn't even a boyfriend. I told her father that it was ok and he said yeah, that you might as well wait until the ONE comes and you just know. I nodded my head in agreement. .... I could now walk out of this room carrying them in my prayers and go to the mats do some major wrestling with the Lord for them.
Earlier in the day I sneaked some time to search for so balm and just happened to read Psalms 8 where it says, where it says 'what is man that you are mindful of him? and where God has made man a little lower than angels and that He gave man dominion over the works of His Hands.' This might be weird that it brought me comfort but I couldn't help but think of all the things God has given us in this life that is like a flower that flourish and passes away. This life is soooooo fragile and the gifts are soooo wonderful. Her gifts? Finding love, marrying a neat guy, having kids .... she probably has a lot more on her list...
A question sent me to wondering ... A mother with early adult children is dying. I am sure she has lots she wants to tell them. Being a daughter myself I cannot dare to go to a time where I don't have my mother to rely on.... I did have a comforting thought... The Word of God has helped me greatly and I am sure for this mother as well. She can rest assured that His Word can guide her children especially because she loved it, they will want to get closer to her by reading It and finding answers needed in today's questions and tests. I love this thought and can let out a comforted sigh...
I told mom that her hubby really loved her and you want to know how I could tell in a short amount of time? He said that finding the love of his life was the best gift Grace College have him. He also asked to hold her hand and said thank you even though it looked like she was sleeping. He has been trying hard to get her home so they can have a bedside wedding of their son today because they are unsure of how long she will be able to hold on and the wedding is schedule at the end of the month. Besides she just wants to go home to die. I don't know how this man is holding on. He did not show any tears but there was a softness around his edges and I am sure that he is putting on his strong face.
I cannot say that she lost her battle with cancer rather she is just finishing this earthy race. She is laying down this earthly mantel to put on her heavenly one called Eternal Life. She is trading in the pain and limitations to walk upright into her Heavenly Father Arms. Her own mother and father are waiting in the wings ready to welcome her home. She will truly understand that death has lost its sting where her loved ones just don't quite understand because it is so raw and painful now. All we can do is 'walk by faith not by sight.' A chorus came to my mind as I was walking and doing some heavy thinking. It brought Joy ... even in this bittersweet time. '... when we all see Jesus, we'll sing and shout the victory!'
♩♬♪♫
Sing the wondrous love of Jesus,
Sing His mercy and His grace.
In the mansions bright and blessèd
He’ll prepare for us a place.
Refrain
When we all get to Heaven,
What a day of rejoicing that will be!
When we all see Jesus,
We’ll sing and shout the victory!
While we walk the pilgrim pathway,
Clouds will overspread the sky;
But when traveling days are over,
Not a shadow, not a sigh.
Refrain
Let us then be true and faithful,
Trusting, serving every day;
Just one glimpse of Him in glory
Will the toils of life repay.
Refrain
Onward to the prize before us!
Soon His beauty we’ll behold;
Soon the pearly gates will open;
We shall tread the streets of gold.
Refrain♪
Words: Eliza E. Hewitt
The woman in this bed is about 8 years older than me. She is in my childhood memories. I remember her and her sisters baby-sitting me and my brother. They had two cute black and white bull dogs called Moses and Sarah. They lived on a farm and I loved their farm house. I haven't seen her sense. My mom works at the hospital on a floor where a lot of cancer patients go when they are having a major battle with cancer and need hospital care. I happened to call mom about a birthday matter coming up and she said our family friend was back in the hospital and it was not good. I told mom I would come up.
I am sensitive and I try to put my feet in other's shoes. I knew her kids where teenagers and I can help but wonder how these kids were going to cope in the days and years ahead. This beautiful woman has a beautiful husband who talked to me so I began to ask him questions learning more about his family and even finding common bonds like going to the same college. The youngest son was playing football that night. The middle son is marrying and coming home from Chicago this month. The oldest has graduated from college and as a teaching job. She hasn't found love in college and there isn't even a boyfriend. I told her father that it was ok and he said yeah, that you might as well wait until the ONE comes and you just know. I nodded my head in agreement. .... I could now walk out of this room carrying them in my prayers and go to the mats do some major wrestling with the Lord for them.
Earlier in the day I sneaked some time to search for so balm and just happened to read Psalms 8 where it says, where it says 'what is man that you are mindful of him? and where God has made man a little lower than angels and that He gave man dominion over the works of His Hands.' This might be weird that it brought me comfort but I couldn't help but think of all the things God has given us in this life that is like a flower that flourish and passes away. This life is soooooo fragile and the gifts are soooo wonderful. Her gifts? Finding love, marrying a neat guy, having kids .... she probably has a lot more on her list...
A question sent me to wondering ... A mother with early adult children is dying. I am sure she has lots she wants to tell them. Being a daughter myself I cannot dare to go to a time where I don't have my mother to rely on.... I did have a comforting thought... The Word of God has helped me greatly and I am sure for this mother as well. She can rest assured that His Word can guide her children especially because she loved it, they will want to get closer to her by reading It and finding answers needed in today's questions and tests. I love this thought and can let out a comforted sigh...
I told mom that her hubby really loved her and you want to know how I could tell in a short amount of time? He said that finding the love of his life was the best gift Grace College have him. He also asked to hold her hand and said thank you even though it looked like she was sleeping. He has been trying hard to get her home so they can have a bedside wedding of their son today because they are unsure of how long she will be able to hold on and the wedding is schedule at the end of the month. Besides she just wants to go home to die. I don't know how this man is holding on. He did not show any tears but there was a softness around his edges and I am sure that he is putting on his strong face.
I cannot say that she lost her battle with cancer rather she is just finishing this earthy race. She is laying down this earthly mantel to put on her heavenly one called Eternal Life. She is trading in the pain and limitations to walk upright into her Heavenly Father Arms. Her own mother and father are waiting in the wings ready to welcome her home. She will truly understand that death has lost its sting where her loved ones just don't quite understand because it is so raw and painful now. All we can do is 'walk by faith not by sight.' A chorus came to my mind as I was walking and doing some heavy thinking. It brought Joy ... even in this bittersweet time. '... when we all see Jesus, we'll sing and shout the victory!'
♩♬♪♫
Sing the wondrous love of Jesus,
Sing His mercy and His grace.
In the mansions bright and blessèd
He’ll prepare for us a place.
Refrain
When we all get to Heaven,
What a day of rejoicing that will be!
When we all see Jesus,
We’ll sing and shout the victory!
While we walk the pilgrim pathway,
Clouds will overspread the sky;
But when traveling days are over,
Not a shadow, not a sigh.
Refrain
Let us then be true and faithful,
Trusting, serving every day;
Just one glimpse of Him in glory
Will the toils of life repay.
Refrain
Onward to the prize before us!
Soon His beauty we’ll behold;
Soon the pearly gates will open;
We shall tread the streets of gold.
Refrain♪
Words: Eliza E. Hewitt
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
NOT ALONE even in death!
Last week Mom was telling me about a phone call with her sister. The sister was bring up the past and making Mom feel bad for not being there when Grandma died. Grandma L did way back in the early 90's and today is the 2010. My Aunt has been like this all of her life while Mom has been the brunt of her older sister's verbiage.
After the conversation with Mom, I was thinking about it and the story of King David and the lost of his son with Bathsheba that I read two weeks earlier came to mind. Do you remember what he did? When his baby son was struck ill, King David pleaded with God, would not eat, spent nights lying on the ground. However, on the seventh day the son died, David got up and cleaned up and WORSHIPED THE LORD and then ate food. The servants could not understand this. They thought the death would send David over the edge. Get this: David said, "While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought , 'Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let my child life.' but now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me."(II Sam 12:23) Read the whole account in II Sam 11-12:23 & Ps 51.
I found King David's words very comforting to me as I was manning the phone when Grandma was ready to go. I could have made the rushed call telling my parents to get home fast. But in my young adult mind, it takes two hours to get to Grandma from home and my parents were away on a weekend vacation they rarely take. Grandma hadn't been herself for a while. She just was quiet and stared into space. I highly doubted that they would have gotten back in time to see her pass. So this many years later, it was good to read this and share this Mom. We couldn't keep Grandma here nor did we want to. This earth is not our homeland (Hebrews 11:13-16) and why would we want to keep her from going in the Arms of Jesus to her inheritance? Plus, in due time we will be going to her.
I know that some feel the strong need to be there in the final breaths while others do not what to carry this visual in their minds when all they want to remember are the good memories, the life not the end! Some people are blessed to have people surround them in their death while others die alone. Then I had the thought that when you are a believer that you are already walking with the Lord and you are not alone even in death. What a BLESSED thought!
After the conversation with Mom, I was thinking about it and the story of King David and the lost of his son with Bathsheba that I read two weeks earlier came to mind. Do you remember what he did? When his baby son was struck ill, King David pleaded with God, would not eat, spent nights lying on the ground. However, on the seventh day the son died, David got up and cleaned up and WORSHIPED THE LORD and then ate food. The servants could not understand this. They thought the death would send David over the edge. Get this: David said, "While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought , 'Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let my child life.' but now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me."(II Sam 12:23) Read the whole account in II Sam 11-12:23 & Ps 51.
I found King David's words very comforting to me as I was manning the phone when Grandma was ready to go. I could have made the rushed call telling my parents to get home fast. But in my young adult mind, it takes two hours to get to Grandma from home and my parents were away on a weekend vacation they rarely take. Grandma hadn't been herself for a while. She just was quiet and stared into space. I highly doubted that they would have gotten back in time to see her pass. So this many years later, it was good to read this and share this Mom. We couldn't keep Grandma here nor did we want to. This earth is not our homeland (Hebrews 11:13-16) and why would we want to keep her from going in the Arms of Jesus to her inheritance? Plus, in due time we will be going to her.
I know that some feel the strong need to be there in the final breaths while others do not what to carry this visual in their minds when all they want to remember are the good memories, the life not the end! Some people are blessed to have people surround them in their death while others die alone. Then I had the thought that when you are a believer that you are already walking with the Lord and you are not alone even in death. What a BLESSED thought!
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