living in contrasts...

I believe we live our lives in front of backdrops of contrast.  It is not something you can explain.  It is a learning place where we so often rush by without notice.  And in those times when we are knocked to our knees in pain, we tend to lose our hope and even our faith.  If only we stop and take time to observe … If only we hold to our faith … If only we look full in the Face of God unashamed, the Mystery of life’s contrasts will only enhance our living a lifestyle of love.

Tomorrow they will be laying to rest a community hero, a police officer who was off duty Friday night out with his girlfriend when two young men chose them to die for money in their pockets.  Three generations of instincts kicked in as this policeman moved in front of his girlfriend while getting his piece to fire.  Three bullets to his head did not stop him from wounding the shooter.  After 24 hours of struggling through several strokes, the policeman walked into eternity.   Today I found out that this policeman’s choice of song to sing was Tim McGraw’s “Don’t Take the Girl”.  Almost 37 years… third generation policeman… working to get into the K-9 unit like his dad before him…  back in his old neighborhood… a man courting prospect of uniting with a woman… A life warm and bright against the backdrop of desperation and evil… This is an extraordinary event contrasting good and bad.

Then there are just plain ordinary life events.  I know of someone who goes MIA a lot.  I have tenaciously stood my ground and waited for his comeback.  I know the issues he is dealing with.  As the days stretch into a year, I wonder at my reasons for staying the course.  My gut and God-reaction says I need to prove trust.  What happens when he comes back?  Is he staying away because he thinks I won’t be there waiting? Or anger will be my first retort?  Of late I have boiled it down to contrast not conflict.  Sure, I would love to sit down and talk this out.  Sure, it is painful with all the terrible thoughts that pound in my brain.  All it is living a contrast of staying and leaving.  I refuse to do anything but stay.

Contrasts can inspire hope even if it doesn’t make sense.  I chose to live my love out tenaciously…even if it is excruciating.