Blue Cloud ...

I am in love!  I am in love!!  I am in love!!!  Can you tell?  I am in love!!!   I am going to sound just like a wine connoisseur!  You know the ones who twirl the juice around in their glasses, the ones that sniff, and the ones that taste by swishing and spitting out the wine.  They then proclaim they can taste rain or some fruit or maybe it taste a feeling like maybe it was rustic.  I just cannot phantom all those tastes in some fermented grape juice!  That is until now....  that is what love is all about.

My house is full of multi beiges and this washed out beige pale sick green.  I lived 16 years of beige.  I want crisp white.  I like it stark and cool.  But for one room I want something different than white so I was thinking a grey that is all the rage.  However grey can be too boring or it can even have a base of green in it.  I was struggling.  See I have this really cool room that gets a lot of sun with vaulted ceiling.  It also has a sliding glass door.  It gets real hot in there. I want this to be my library and where I house my iMac.  I want it to cool in the summer and warm in the winter.  I want this room to inspire me.  I want to get lost in my thoughts and to be able to daydream all the while with my fingers dancing out my thoughts and dreams upon my silver keyboard.

I thought I would find a perfect grey but the paint cards I was bringing home were shades of dusty blue.    They would change to green in certain lights.   Some were too bright.  Some too dark.  Most not grey at all.  The days were counting down to my paint vacation.  I had to make a decision and fast.

I walked into my home improvement store and found an all in one paint.  Then I found the color.  I bought it and came home with it.  It is a bit DARK!  I thought my house was going to be white!  I hoped others would like it too.  I had taken far too long in deciding the paint color and I needed to power through!  I have got to get this house done.  I have to get the jeep inside the garage before winter.  I am taking far too long getting this done.  Never mind that I had foot injury keeping me out of the of commission for those first two months.

I put this dark blue color on the walls.  No turning back now.  In the midst of it I looked out into my living room and noticed this same blue in my furniture.  Then I realized this same blue is my white dishes.  Duh!  No wonder I didn't flip flop.  I picked this color and just went with it!  This is my ultimate favorite social color!  It is calming - something I hope others see in me.

This color that is on my library walls is called Blue Cloud.  I describe it as the color an oil artist would pick for those chilly mountain scene.  When the sun shines full on it is a bold strong blue.  When it night out and you turn on a low lamp, it has soft accent of purple.  If you turn on the overhead light, there is a rich red berry tone that echoes.  Creamy white window treatments and carpet gives a good pop.  Reds compliment.  Dark woods make it rich.  Silver makes it elegant.

Now all I need to find is a beautiful corner desk so that I can put the iMac there so that on side I have the window and the other side have the sliding glass door.  Then I can take it all in and then exhale through my fingers and onto the screen.

My brain is soothed and energized by Blue Cloud paint.  I cannot help but BEAM I am so in love!!!

paint here, paint there, paint on my feet...

What a difference it makes when you have a comrade in arms!  I have had the grumps this week and I think it had to do with just missing someone special.  I crave partnership and I have found that I work better about the house when I can do it with someone.  I feed off their energy.   I also know how to do the supportive undertones.  Mmmmm, duets fascinate me.  I love to harmonize.

I took the day off and I wasn't sure how today would end up.  I had Mom come over and we painted my craft cave white.  I should love painting because I love to paint on glass.  I just wasn't sure I wanted to do it with walls and have a mess.  I have these paint nightmares that you make a little mess here and when  you go to clean it up, the mess grows and grows...... Yikes!!!

With one gallon of white ceiling paint left by the previous owners, we had Menards spin the paint which they did for free.  I now have the start of white walls to my craft cave.  I must get another lamp.  It totally brightens up the place.  I wanted everything white so that I can take pictures down there.  My craft furniture and storage is mostly white.  I do not care if it is toooo much white.  I love it.

When Mom left I realized my brain had a wonderful vacation from over thinking and I am feeling pretty happy!  There is just something about having another person around helps lighten the load.  So as I look forward to a holiday weekend, I think I have enough fuel to put on a second coat of paint all by myself and maybe this time I won't get it on the bottom of my feet!

He tells me I am His own...

A hot shower wakes up my brain but sadness lingers in my soul. Songs and hymns have always chased darkness away allowing Light to enter. A split second ticks ♪ "and He walks with me and He talks with me and He tells me I am His own" ♪. How perfect!

I have Someone Who walks with me. I'm not alone! I have Someone Who talks with me. He knows my thoughts and isn't afraid! He tells me what to do even if it is to wait. I belong to to Someone. This misfit isn't an outcast! I had to pour out my gratitude to my Heavenly Father.

Dearest Heavenly Father,
This is where I struggle most.  I desire at the very least a mental soul partnership yet I am a loner.  I can't stand herds or going with the in crowd but I crave that one on one connection.  I was a melancholy until I realized that my voice needed to sing.  You brought someone into my life yet as he roves I am here alone with You.  Thank You for walking with me on my journey.  Thank You for listening and speaking.  You are comfort and peace to a heavy withering old soul.  Thank You for creating me even if everything I am doesn't fit that well.  There is a reason and a purpose for my life.  Thank You for keeping me.  You are the Great Keeper and Lover of my heart and soul.   Thank You for this blog.  I often meet You here as my thoughts form and fly out through my fingers.  Your Ways are secret and higher than mine.  I long to stop striving!  I long to simply and peacefully rest in YOUR ALMIGHTY ARMS!!!!
always Yours,
little keeper

Prayer of Salvation …

I heard this story second hand so I'll try to retell it the best that I can.

"A pastor said that no one gets saved without someone else saying a prayer for you.

A man boldly proclaimed that it was not true. He had no family nor friends that made that prayer for him.

Later when he got married his soon to to be parents-in-law welcomed him into the family by saying that they had been praying for him - the Christian man their daughter would marry."

How interesting and thought provoking!! I'm I praying for salvation for a lost dear soul that has no one else that will pray for them? I have some dear ones - lost ones. I can get weary and I must not!!!!

Contained ...

Lucy Swindoll asked her brother this question.  I saw it and thought it was an interesting question.  Of course, I love questions and I love to ask them and mostly like to hear the response.  So, I ask you - What is your favorite feeling and why?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I think my favorite feeling would be 'contained'.  Maybe better words would be 'at rest', 'peaceful', 'calm', 'safe'...  I like crawling under the heavy covers and pulling them up tight to my chin or nose and turning down the dimmed lights to darkness.  I imagine God's Arm over me and everything else is shut down.  No more worries.  I can't stand drama.  It doesn't need to be that hard.  I deal with a boss that makes things bigger than they are.  I shake my head (when she isn't looking) and send a prayer.  I have a little brother that is a huge worry wort and gets dramatic about things.  I keep thinking that I have 10 years on him and maybe he will mellow out or not!  I do have those feelings of angst in me but I try to keep the outer layer calm.  I do go quiet when there is turmoil about or if I am in pain.  Keeping contained or calm is my coping mechanism.  Don't get me wrong, I am very passionate and I have some majorly strong feelings and they do walk about aloud.  I do have my moments that I am out of control.  I do think that they are less as I have grown up. {wink wink} But like we have uncovered I am still very much a girl with brainy moments.  I am a quiet person and I believe in being a good neighbor.  I have been an apartment dweller in a building of 8 where it was more like communal living.  I lived in someone's else cigarette smoke and violent rampages.  Yelling makes me shut down.  All this is what I call 'living outside your box'.  I believe the only thing you should do outside the box is creative thinking!  Yes, my favorite feeling is 'contained'.  

chaos & home sweet home!

Whew!  I am a new home owner all of three weeks plus an added bonus of a broken toe(s) or foot as well making it very difficult to unpack and carry heavy loads.  It has been hard to keep my little nose above the  chaos.

Stuff is everywhere.  There is stuff in the basement and stuff in the garage and stuff in the little room.  I wouldn't mind so much if I wasn't hobbling up and down the stairs and out into the chilly garage with a bum foot.  My foot lets me know by throwing a very hot temper tantrum.  I finally popped the blood blister but the toe nail needs to come off.  So I am in for a few more weeks of discomfort.  Oh, how did I break my toe/foot?  Well, blunt force trauma from a 20 pound frozen turkey when I tried to help and empty out the frig and freezer for the move!

Then there were the verrrrrrrrrrrry dirty carpets!  My Mom has three boy dogs and a hubby that can track up a white carpet in a jiffy and her carpets are pretty clean.  I just can't believe how many spots that should have been an easy clean was left untreated.  We are tackling the carpets which means stuff is moved about which leaves me in a state of mess.  The master bedroom carpet was majorly a mud room!  The water was sickening very dirty!  Not sure if I will sleep in there or out on the sofa tonight as the carpets dry out.

After the carpets I would like to tackle the walls with fresh coats of paint.  I want white for most of the living parts and the for the craft room and a grey for the library and for the hallways.  I would like to tackle the craft cave as my first room to complete.  I already know what I want in that room.  All the white furniture is going in there with pops of blue.  Once I get my craft room organized, I can have a place to go to when it gets overwhelming.

I know this is all good.  I have been hearing "God Will Take Care of You" on BNNRadio.org a lot this week.  It sort of made me nervous but then I just took it heart that it is God just calming me down.  Don't get me wrong, I do love this place and the chaos will pass.  This is a huge feast and I plan on not choking!  I do have lots of blessings.  I am very happy that the spots came up in the dining room and I will be happy about the bedroom carpet too.  I have a pantry!!!  I love that!  No more excuses of over buying an item of food and missing out on another.  Once glance - ok, a looooong glance - and I know what to buy at the grocery store.  My cupboards are nice and everything is organized and pretty.  I do have a few drawers to figure out and some things to decide if I really need to keep.  These things are all lovely and I am grateful for but there is something that really toppings!

I have changed wildlife for God's wildlife!  I have bunnies eating Sunday breakkie with me.  A squirrel tapped the patio door and scared me but he stayed there a bit and then scampered off.  I was so happy to have that visit.  Then Thursday morning when I opened up the house for the day, I spied a silver tan girl squirrel with a brown ombre boy squirrel drinking from the birdbath like two lovers at the soda shop!  Then of course I enjoy the robins and the cardinal couple but not so much the big black birds.  Then there is this orange butterfly that is hanging out.  I just don't understand why I am seeing this butterfly in spring when I think I should be seeing caterpillars.  Dad says you have to have butterflies before caterpillars.  Yup.  Of course there are the flowers too that is a new surprise with each bloom like gifts at your birthday party.

I have taken advantage of eating on the patio step twice now when the weather has been warm enough to enjoy.  So who needs a vacation on a secluded sandy beach somewhere warm when you have a nice little home to make your own and a nice little patio to enjoy and some nooks to make an herb garden in?

boast in the Lord...

I will extol the Lord at all times;
His Praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the Lord;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
Glorify the Lord with me;
let us exhale His Name together.

I sought the Lord,
and He heard me
and He delivered me from all my fears.
Those who look to Him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.
This poor man called, and the Lord heard him;
He saved him out of all his troubles.
The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him
and He delivers them.


Taste and see that the Lord is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him.
Fear the Lord, you His saints,
for those who fear Him lack nothing.
The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.

Psalms 34:1-10

Old songs straight from His Word sung from an aching heart finds healing salve of peace.

I found fear was the enemy.  Then I found that when I sought after the Lord that He heard me and calmed the fear that rages within my heart.  I made the next step to see if a dream was within my grasp but I wanted a no if this dream was going to be a nightmare after all the bells and whistles faded.  That no is more evident and I need to graciously bow out.  My Heavenly Father not only asks for me to trade my fear in for faith but asks me to rejoice no matter which way the path goes....

clip the butterfly wings...

I got to see the condo on Tuesday.  I liked it from the pictures but the pictures did not do it justice and I love it!  I won't lie but I have been daydreaming of paint colors and room schemes.  I want all the greens and beiges out of the place.  I think grey along with white should be slathered on the walls.  Then I am wondering if I can get that all done at least for the main floor before I move in and make it mine.  Sighs.

The daydreaming stops today.  Before I had let my brain race away in all the possibilities, I had asked God to say no if I couldn't do it and for me to accept it.  Well, I am 99.9% sure that it will be a no come Tuesday.  With all the upfront fees, it will wipe out my savings.  I don't think they will accept the loan for the amount I need and I could not feel safe in allowing myself no cushion.

So I must pack away the library, the patio, the kitchen, master bedroom and bath plans.  Now is the time to purge.  With all that daydreaming, I allowed the cramped space fuel the desire to get out and see if I could spread my wings.  Can you stuff butterfly wings back into the cocoon?  Nah, I don't think so.

investment vs. ball and chain...

No, I am not talking marriage here!  Marriage should never be associated with such confinement but rather should be home, a safe place.  Talking about a home and I hate to admit it but buying a home is a ball and chain.  I just don't see it any other way.

I didn't always feel like that.  My little girl dreams always had a home.  It just was a matter of fact.  That is what adults do.  They have a family and a family home.  They had a patch of land and of course, a picket fence.  Don't forget the pups.

Whoa!  My life hasn't ended up that way.  I have a single life and lifestyle.  I have just gotten to a place where I feel the money is just right.  I'm not scraping the barrel.  The groceries and the gas has gone up and yet I feel that for the most part that I can get by ok.  Yet with the rumors and the uneasiness out there, it is nice to have a cushion.  I feel like I have that.  Yes, I like to shop and my weekly shopping excursions are my only dependable social entertainment.  Of course, I not afraid to spend even though I do pretty well at pinching pennies.  I have this new feeling of being able to give money to God above and beyond my tithe.  I like this feeling a lot.  I don't want to go back.  I can't go back.

I am also feeling that Jesus is coming back soon.  Do I really need a house?  Why sock money into a house when that money could have a better use.  But then again, I don't know the time.  This world could have a few more spins around the dial even though there is a lot of shaking and rattling.  It just isn't the waters and earth giving way but governments, housing, gas, and the economies.  No body or country is immune.

I may be hitting the mid life crisis zone but I look young and feeeeeeeeeeeeel like a little girl.  Buying a house all by my lonesome is sooooooo out of my league!  I admit I am a shy one maybe not so much in my writing, but have a quiet personality and it suits me just right.  It is what makes me a goooood listener but when I have something to say aloud, I'm usually not heard or they put their own spin on what they think I am or on what I say.  I may be a first born and forge ahead on my own leaving the herds behind, but I have this strong wingman trait and it does NOT like to be a sole pilot in such huge endeavors.  Help!  This is way too much for me.

Like I said I am single and if I set down roots in brick and mortar then there are no more dreams of wings.  I have friends to the west and a couple of friends in other countries.  It would be cool to go see them if I could muster up strength in my wings.  I do admit that making a home out of a house is a dream too.  I love house magazines and blogs for color schemes, storage ideas, and layouts.  Having it become a reality is a bit scary.  I will have to make a go on my ideas and supposed talent.  I know I could never have a dream house, the house must it meet it in a general sense because this house will have to do until the end of my days.

Things have been getting a bit dicey  here in my apartment building.  Had a bad neighbor in December and things were getting bad.  I also deal with cigarette smoke getting into my home and I am allergic to it.  Then the apartment dweller below like to leave his bathroom fan on for weeks at a time and I can't stand unnecessary noise.  Besides being a crafter makes my little dwelling even smaller.  It would be nice to stretch out a bit.

My coworker who has been searching for house herself found me a house she thinks has my name all over it.  Argh!  So far she is right!  It is a condo with a garage.  It has a place for a library!!! Something I have dreamed about.  The basement is finished so it would take the place of having a cute upper floor.  I could see a craft room downstairs.  What topped it off because it was unexpected but right down my alley was the flag pole out front.

I need to get my brain and heart under the Great Shepherd's care.  The future can keep.  I must trade in the fear for trust and obedience.  God has proven Himself.  He has never forsaken me.  Not only has He been there in the little everyday things but He helped my parents with their house and He answered a big prayer of mine.  I cannot forget these answered prayers not only because they were huge but also because they are small and everyday.  He has been the Partner and the Pilot and I have been treating Him as such.  I bring things to Him.  I need to let Him drive this adventure and I just relax and go for the ride.  If I push or even if I pull (can't believe I just said pull but it is true - I can't pull back), I would usurp God's hold on my life.

Keep me safe, O God,

for in You I take refuge.

I said to the Lord,

"You are my Lord; apart from You I have no good thing."

~ Psalms 16: 1&2

Dear Heavenly Father,

I am going to share with my parents my feelings so that they know my fears but I will also show my Dad the link to that condo.  Most importantly You know my fears and dreams.  You know my personality and You know what I can handle.  This house might not even by mine.  You will be there in pain and in 

happiness.  Your Presence is fullness of JOY.  I must stay in Your Arms.  I am here for the ride.  I am putting in place Your Words to keep my mind stayed on You.  Thank You for keeping me.
always,
keeper

skinny comments ...

I was born skinny and have always heard the comments about my weight.  One thing that is really hard to forget was the comments at Thanksgiving.  I never was a big fan of bread.  It had its place like a sandwich or toast for a quick brekkie but at Thanksgiving I was never going to allow it to trump the good food.  I could have a nice plate full of food and even take seconds now and again but because I didn't take a biscuit my poor grandmother would go on and on about how skinny I was and why wasn't I eating.  She knew better too as she thought my father was too skinny and hauled him off to the doctor only to hear that he was fine.  Like father like daughter.

Now with 36 food allergies keeping my food intake in check, I still hear the comments.  I go to a church that likes to eat and when I don't, the ladies make comments like 'no wonder you stay skinny.'  I still have body issues like all women and feel like I have to keep my mouth shut so as not to offend anyone else but oh, I am treated like their comments don't hurt or bother me.  I am quiet person and keep my raging thoughts inside because I don't want to backbite.  Then when I am having a low day, all these little things pile up into how big of a misfit I am.

I happened across a verse in the Bible that encourages me.  You can say that it is a bit out of context but then again it really fits. I am thinking I should make up a shirt to wear on the food events at church but then again that would be too pompous of me right?

"For the Kingdom of God 

is not the matter of eating and drinking,

but of Righteousness, Peace, and JOY in the Holy Spirit."

~Romans 14:17

I know that fellowship seems to involve food but that fellowship is broken when the peace is crushed and the JOY is stolen when you make the bad choice of making a food comment that breaks a woman's heart in two.  Please fellowship with me by taking a walk and talking about God's Beautiful Handiwork.  Please fellowship with me by making something with our hands and encouraging others with homemade happiness.  Oh, how much more we all could get out of fellowship if we could get rid of the food!

Though one day I will be able to eat in fellowship with Right Ways, Peace, and JOY in the Holy Spirit and it will be all the beautiful brightly colored fruits and veggies.  I will look at you with a twinkle in my eye because truly this is my Bridal Feast and no skinny comment will hurt or break me again.

ps.  Don't get me wrong.  I am glad I am skinny but it still hurts to hear women make comments.  And I am glad you can't read my mind because as you fill your plate with four and five desserts, all I can think of is cancer...... or diabetes..... all the borrowing of health issues...... and by no means does that mean I am safe but why borrow trouble we don't have to...

Heavenly Snow in Heaven ...

sandboy: Looks soooooooooooo cold. I have to feel it before the Lord comes!! Might not be snow in heaven????


snowgirl: You are probably right about there not being snow in Heaven so you better start making plans. 

 But I have a couple wild thoughts - you know my speciality - where I see things from different sides.

 Maybe there will be snow because God describes our hearts that are cleaned through the blood of Christ as white as snow. When you you go through the dark rainy muddy days of November and see the world transform into a winter wonderland, you gave a new take on beauty.

 Another thought that is really out there is that yes, we will know things but when we get to Heaven, I think we will get to discover more and more about God. What better why to Praise God than to get excited about learning more and more about Him. If I can't continue this discovery that I so enjoy here on earth, I'm afraid that Heaven would be a bit boring and God wouldn't have that! So what does this discovery look like? God has this huge library of HIStory. Not only is it full of books for the book lovers but it is out this world state of the art multimedia room. Better than anything Apple could dream up. You know how people describe it as a tapestry and we only see one side of it … well, I think we will get to see how God wove everything together but better yet I think we can step into that HIStory and experience how all the intricate details came together. Mind blowing!!!!! I can't wait!!!!!!! We will be able to see our part of HIStory but others too and how God worked all things together. Like Abe Lincoln or King David or Queen Esther etc. So why not experience the creation of things He created like snow. Again I think enjoying the snow like walking in it or throwing a few snowballs or making snow angels or snowmen or stuffing snow playfully down the neck of a loved one is enjoying God.

 I know that it is more likely that the new earth will be like it was before the flood but this girl has some wild thoughts and can't wait to see how He will reveal Himself to us.


sandboy:  I think you are right to assume there will be exciting days with our Lord; experiencing Him dwelling in us as One. And I think there are excitingly interesting things to do and see when we go to be with Him.

He is a creator. No; better; He is the Creator of creators. So I think it's fairly safe to say He will go on creating; it's His nature and character to create.   What wonderful things will He create, and what wonderful things will we create with Him? 

Wondrous times ahead indeed!!

As a side thought, if He is revealed in creation, and Creation is an expression of Him (Rom 1:20), and He has no end, then does it suggest that there will be no end to Him expressing Himself, and so no end to His creating?

beaming {v.}

I love words.  I put certain value on certain words that I hold dearly.  So what do you do when you feel sooooooo much adoration and feeling like it is growing in the pit of your heart to the extent that you just might burst into a million little pieces?  What do you do when you want to scream "I love you" or "you are making me fall in love with you, please don't stop!" and you really can't because you are a girl and you are waiting for him to declare first?   I have been saying everything all around the those three little words but I just wanted one word because it is all I can get out and I need it to say everything...... I need it to be a word that captures a 'pictureful'.

BEAMING has to do.  It is little o' me with bright eyes like big brown stars and a magawatt smile as wide as my face. It is me bursting with a happy glow and tingly electricity pulsing through my veins.  Maybe a little nervous giggle and bashfulness like you have a secret that is just killing you to keep.... ahh, beaming should do.... pretty much my state of being

Giving and Forgiving ...

What makes life worth the living

Is our giving and forgiving;

Giving tiny bits of kindness

That will leave a JOY behind us,

And forgiving bitter trifles 

That the right word often stifles,

For the little things are bigger

Than we often stop to figure.

What makes life worth the living

Is our giving and forgiving.

~ poem written by Thomas Grant Springer

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ahhh, yes!  It is those little things.... those enjoyable things.... that are soooo huge.  Like his laughter.  Like his insight.  Like his love of God.  Like his gentleness with oh so shy me.  Like his words of encouragement.  I hold those so dear in my heart....  I will forgive to have all those precious little things back ... I did and phew! my heart has grown bigger than ever .... I think I shall burst!

I will wait for you ...

If it takes forever I will wait for you

For a thousand summers I will wait for you

Till you're back beside me, till I'm holding you

Till I hear you sigh here in my arms

Anywhere you wander, anywhere you go

Every day remember how I love you so

In your heart believe what in my heart I know

That forever more I'll wait for you

The clock will tick away the hours one by one

Then the time will come when all the waiting's done

The time when you return and find me here and run

Straight to my waiting arms

If it takes forever I will wait for you

For a thousand summers I will wait for you

Till you're here beside me, till I'm touching you

And forevermore sharing your love

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I heard this songon the Lawrence Welk show tonight.  I had to search for the lyrics... and note it here.  See I waited for someone.  I didn't think he would come back and was pleasantly surprised.  Now the question to why did I wait comes up.  Hard to explain.  It does have to be the right person.  I suppose it is only right that if I truly don't understand why he went away that he won't understand totally why I stayed.  I chalk it up to God's Knowing and His Doing.  I am so grateful because God made me better through his leaving and it could be possible that the one who left needed me to wait for him.  God's Ways are a bit mysterious yet I love that about Him.  

over the wall thief ...

I know that John 10:1 is about salvation but after listening to John Bunyan's Pilgrim Progress where Christian confronted the those who had come into the fold by the wall and called them thieves, I see marriage as a sheepfold of sorts.  As always my mind had many other strands of thoughts and this struck a cord with me and connected a dangling dot.  It gave me a visual.

Marriage is scared and God ordained.  I just cannot understand why gay people want marriage.   They are already living in defiance against God according to Romans 1 so why do they feel the need for marriage?  Just live in defiance, shake your fist against God, and live together.  These days you don't really need marriage with all the living together, right?  Lets be truthful - marrying the same sex would have more of a mutinous impact, right?  Lets show God who is god!

To enter the fold of marriage though the gate is to be a Christian man and wife following God's rules.  To enter into marriage any other way is to climb over the wall like a thief trying to gain all the goodies but without rules.  Just because you are inside the walls of marriage doesn't mean God will overlook how you got in over the wall.  You will be standing there in all your thieving shame.  See, God will always have the last word.  Your dirty rotten sniff-neck obstinate will be nothing compared to the passionate heat of jealousy from the Almighty.  If only you would look deeper into God's design for marriage.  He is showing you the picture of how beautiful our relationship can be with God.  Trust Him.

Needless to say marriage is different than salvation but I see marriage as a crown to cast upon my Heavenly Savior as well as a very important mission field in these deteriorating last days.  Be encouraged this visual goes both ways.  If you have entered though the gate of marriage, what an honor to give to the King of kings.

I guess what really caught my thoughts was that if within the fold whatever the fold it might be and their is someone in there that doesn't belong it is because they are a thief. What thief would steal garbage? They are going to steal the diamonds!  And maybe that is all that needs to be said...???

Fav Movies 2011

* Dolphin Tale

* Courageous

* Faith Like Potatoes

* The Guys

~~~~
I can't believe these were the only new movies I watched this year!

Fav Quotes of 2011

"Don't postpone the JOY"

"Nothing is trouble unless you let it be." ~Orville Swindoll, older brother of Chuck & Lucy Swindoll

* "To serve God - what is better than that?"  - Gary Chapman

*  “The worst feeling isn’t being lonely but being forgotten by someone you can’t forget.” - unknown

* "The more time you spend alone with God, you will find out you are not alone." ~ Ravi Zacharias

* "A friend is one who carries your sorrows on his back." ~ American Indian proverb

* "When you love someone, you don't walk away from them.". 

~ Jodie Foster about Mel Gibson

* "Grief is the price we pay for love." 

~ Prince William shared his grandmother's wisdom to the earthquake shaken Christchurch, NZ

• "When a man loves his wife, he loves himself and vice versa." 

~ J. Vernon McGee

* "Every relationship begins with an invitation.". ~ Gary Chapman

* “How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand… there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend. Some hurts that go too deep, that have taken hold.”

— The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien

* "The condition for a miracle is impossibility.".  - faith like potatoes

* "All the darkness in the world cannot put out light, but one match can push back the darkness." ~ 'Riches Stored in Secret Places' by VDavis

* “It is not about finding the good life but rather it is living a true life.”

~Pastor Chuck Swindoll after studying I Timothy

* "A holy life will produce the deepest impression. Lighthouses blow no horns, they only shine."

~ Dwight L Moody

* "Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength."

~  Charles Spurgeon

* "When God says 'thou shalt not,' He is protecting you. When God says 'thou shalt,' He is telling you to help yourself to happiness.".

~ Pastor Adrien Rodgers

* "A complainer does not believe in the Sovereign Hand of God."

~ Pastor Chuck Swindoll

* "Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do." - John Wooden

* "As we tend to do with anything that hurts, the first thing we do in the face of depression is try to find ways to escape it-and if we can't escape it, at least to fix it. But, as with ass suffering, we must lean into the pain and pay the price for healing. ~ 'Riches Stored in Secret Places' by VDavis

* "Thy life is in My hands. I can only use what is available to Me at the moment." ~ Jesus (from 'Come Away My Beloved' by Francis J Roberts)

* "All I ask of you is five smooth stones and a sling of faith. I'll take it from there. You don't have to wear somebody else's armor. You just trust Me. And I'll strip you down to nothing but faith, and then I'll accomplish a victory where I'll get the glory. But as for you . . . you trust Me." 

~ Chuck Swindoll's paraphrase of what God was telling young David & us in our today battles

* "The Will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."

* "By mixing a little truth with it, they had made their lie far stronger.

~ C.S. Lewis

* "Every Christian should be both conservative & radical; conservative in preserving the faith & radical in applying it. "     

~John Stott, 1921-2011

* "First, when God says no, it means He has a better way, and He expects me to support it.  Second, my very best reaction is cooperation and humility."

~ Chuck Swindoll from "Great Days in Great Lives"

* "When God sets out to multiply, Satan sets out to divide."

~ Adrian Rogers  

* "You cannot use what you do not have. So if you are shy, be shy. If you are outgoing, be outgoing. She may not want the whole truth but she wants the real you. She may not want to see it all at once but she wants to see it.".  ~ Hitch

* “How does one become a butterfly?” she asked pensively. ”You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

• "The employer will notice your spirit before he will notice your diligence.". ~ Chuck Swindoll on Daniel's behavior 

• "Your journey is a part of you. You can put stuff deep in your pockets and take it to your grave or you can help somebody. Don't hog your journey; it's not just for you." 

• "I don't want to lose you." 

   "Then don't." 

~ Message in a Bottle 

• “Do not think that love in order to be genuine has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” ~ Mother Teresa 

• "Every morn brought forth a noble change And every change brought forth a noble knight." ~ Winston Churchill 

• “Too many people write their blessings in the sand but engrave their sorrows in marble.” — ~Charles Spurgeon 

* Donald Grey Barnhouse wrote a “poem” on the power of love as expressed through the Fruit of the Spirit:

Love is the key.

Joy is love singing. 

Peace is love resting. 

Long-suffering is love enduring. 

Kindness is love’s touch. 

Goodness is love’s character. 

Faithfulness is love’s habit. 

Gentleness is love’s self-forgetfulness. 

Self-control is love holding the reins. 

* "Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds a man down or polishes him up depends on what he is made of."  ~ Josh Billings

* “Never ignore a person that loves you, cares for you, and misses you because one day you might wake up from your sleep and realize that you lost the moon while counting the stars.”

—Unknown  

* "Butterflies are God's proof that we can have a second life."  ~ from Nikita 

* “There are two ways you can get through pain. You can let it destroy you, or you can use it as fuel to drive you: to dream bigger, work harder.”

— Taylor Swift  

* “Better a cup full of JOY than a vault filled with riches.”

—Frances J Roberts 

*  "Is the boat going to go down with God in it?"  ~Mark 4:35-41

* “All you can take with you is that which you’ve given away.”

—on George Bailey’s office wall in It’s a Wonderful Life 

* "my Lifeguard walks on water."

- on a tshirt  

Fav Words of 2011

Churlish 

:   boorish :

Cooee (aus)

: prolonged, shrill, clear call or cry used as a signal by Australian Aborigines and adopted by the settlers in the country:

Fav Tunes of 2011

* "I Won't Let Go" by Rascal Flats

* "Crazy Girl" by Eli Young Band

* "God Sent Me You" by Blake Sheldon

* "Thunder In My Heart" by Leo Sayer

* "Start of Something Good" by Daughtry

* "Rescue Me" by Daughtry

Well, I think this year the songs that see to me most are those about holding on and being there.  You see he came back!  I am over the moon.  I still listen to the heartbreak songs only to remember that through it all God made it good and He made me better.  My arms are open as well as my heart.  My eyes are bright with such an embracing glow....  {happiest sigh ever}

thankful for my every remembrance of you...

to my dearest,
Among the baby girl curls and baby giggles and three hairy boys so animated it turns any bad day into a good one, among family and friends and a million simple little things that hit my radar now, among 365 ordinary days that spans a year, among my continuous maze of thought and chatter, a 'you got mail' stopped me in my tracks and a prayer unfolded in an answer.

Thank you for risking all.  Thank you for your thoughts, for your intelligence, for your honor.  Thank you for your ears, for your study of His Word, for your love of God.  I greatly admire these traits in you and that you would share them with me.  God has truly blessed me with you.  That is heavy.

Philippians 1:3-11
I thank my God upon every remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine making request for you all with JOY, for your fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ; just as it is right for me to think this of you all, because I have you in my heart, inasmuch as both in my chains and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel, you all are partakers with me of Grace.  For God is my witness, how greatly I long for you all with the affection of Jesus Christ.  And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in the knowledge and all discernment,  that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with the firsts of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

always keeper

Thanksgiving - language of respect

Thanksgiving for me has been a continue study for me.  It gives JOY the energy and fire inside.  But most recently I have found that Thanksgiving is the language of respect, honor, and nobility.  Thanksgiving is the language of kings.... more importantly stated as the language of the Kings of kings.  Ahhh, as believers of the One True God, we are royalty!  Imagine that!  Thanksgiving should be on the tips of our tongues

Psalms 92

1  It is good to give thanks to the Lord, And to sing praises to Your name, O Most High;
2 To declare Your lovingkindness in the morning, And Your faithfulness every night,


So why aren't we using more thanksgiving in our speech to our co workers and bosses?  to our friends and family?  to other believers in the Body of Christ?  Why have we become so lazy in our speech and let criticism be our first greeting?  Where is that "holy kiss greeting"?  Maybe that needs to be brought back into our culture...


Pride and criticism cannot be where there is a thankful heart.  Interesting...

his presence - my present ...

Do you know what makes me happy?  His presence.   He lives on the other side of the world but his presence is in his emails or in the his voice on the telephone or in a letter.  It is like he walks into a room full of people and I am there a wallflower of course.  He searches for me until our eyes lock and dance as we find home.  It is like a song that lifts me up and makes me walk a little taller with my feet walking on air.  It is like a hot coal that warms the recesses of my heart making my cheeks warm and revs up my thoughts.  It is like a breeze that ever so lightly touches the skin, like his hand that wipes away a fleeting tear and lifts my chin.  His presence makes me happy. {happy sigh} Just a little happy that I am thankful for.

bones need to be broken today!

In my little kingdom there is no assassinations shooting from the aggressive tongue to zap a happy mood and no invites that make the quiet and reserve go in a panic trying to say no in the most happy and gentle way.  All is well in my kingdom.  Even if the rains are staying for the four day, you are free to get down in some warm toasty sweats and brush out your hair.  Hot pea soup has been cooking just waiting for you to warm the belly.  Blankets are waiting to snuggle up with you.  You are free to read or crochet or listen to some oh so friendly 50's music.  If the music does the trick, you will be up on your feet swinging the blanket around as partner.  Don't you feel better?  I see that smile and your eyes have brighten.

Now tomorrow you shall be ready with a gentle tongue.  Keep your Defender close.  Send Him to the door.

~~~ ***~~~

"... a gentle tongue breaks a bone." 

Proverbs 25:5

"How can anyone enter a Strong Man's house and carry off His possessions 

unless he ties up the Strong Man?  

Then he can rob His house.  

He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters."  

Matthew 12:29-30

"Therefore, be imitators of God as dear children.

And walk in LOVE,

as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us,

an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling aroma.

Ephesians 5:1-2

I know why I'm not a good speller...

You go about your life wondering why you struggle in an area.  You see it at a negative.  Nothing good will come from it.  Until out of the blue God lets you in on the reason.

I love English.  I enjoy a good story and a well crafted word picture.  I am a poet.  My best thoughts comes in by the eyes and through the brain and out through my fingers and onto a white blue lined paper or the white screen.  I have a BA degree in English Education. However, my biggest struggle is the spelling.  I can see the front letters and the caboose letters but in the middle they run together.  Unfortunately, phonetics was not the trend of the day.  I find it embarrassing in front of others.  I love the dictionary though and I am not afraid to use it.  I love the iMac and now the ios5 update for the ipod touch because the dictionary is right there at your finger tips and you don't have to run and lug out the dictionary. I have always meant to reteach myself in spelling but there are always more interesting things to do.

It was Saturday night and the curtain opens up on a scene where the church singles had gathered together for food (yuck), fun, and football (yuck).   One of the girls was commenting on Mrs. So & So from the Ukraine that had written 'Couch So & So' instead of 'Coach So & So'.  I could not believe my ears!  Not only do I like Mrs. So & So, I consider her a rising friend of mine.  First of all believers are not to make fun of other believers or others in general.  I work out there in the world and I am tired of all the backbiting.  Being with believers should be a place to relax and enjoy others.   Second, my life has been filled with multicultural friends.  My Vietnamese high school friend is always calling me asking me English questions.  English is one of the hardest languages to learn.  The rules are not always cut and dry.  I went home quite upset about the comments.  Then I realized why I am bad speller.

I am a quiet observer and a hearty listener.  I know how to ask the questions.  I ultimately want others to feel safe in my presence.  I don't want them to hide.  The real person is Eternal not some misspelled word.

Courageous

Ten stars!

I first saw the previews back in the spring and teared up.  I had to see this movie.  Then this summer while  having a play date with mom, I saw the book and pointed it out to Mom.  The author is a favorite of mine after reading "Deadline" by Randy Alcorn.  This definitely would be a good movie.  Mom was all excited to get this book for Dad.  I said I wasn't sure he would enjoy it.  Dad is a avid reader but not so much novels.  Mom got it and gave it to Dad on his birthday.  Dad loved it and he even asked why we got him the book.  I told him that I told Mom that I didn't he would enjoy it but so glad that I am wrong.

I haven't read the book YET but I did love the movie.  There is a great mix up laughter and even tears.  My favorite part was when Javier Martinez went to get a job and was turned down at the construction sight.  He is talking aloud to God and Adam Mitchell calls out his name.  Adam doesn't know Javier.  All Adam knows is that a Javier was suppose to help with building a shed.  My Dad's favorite scene is when Javier gets all crazy in the back of the cop car.  That is good too.  Oh, Dad says the book is better than the movie.  So of course, read the book too!

It is a story of fathers.  It is a story of loss.  It is a story of faith.  It is a story of making the right decisions even if it hurts and it feels like you are betraying a friend.  It is about making family memories and to cherish each moment you have with your love ones.  It is a story of commitment and not being afraid or being afraid but trusting God.

I recommend this for all fathers and for the women who stand with them.  Being a strong and honorable dad is tough in these last days.  They need all the encouragement they can get.  Girls, let them know they are successful my the light of your eyes and up curve of your smile.  Support good family friendly and faith building movies!!! Let them know we want more!

spirit for life's hard balls ...

Mom told me over the weekend that Dad is struggling with work.  The boss came in and wants to bring a younger guy to head up the team that my Dad is in charge of.  My Dad is very diligent and puts a lot of pride into what he does.  Now he has a weight on his heart.  I am frustrated.  He doesn't need anymore health issues to kick up at this time of his life.

Then I realized what Chuck Swindoll had said about Daniel ~ "The employer will notice your spirit before he will notice your diligence." ~ is right on.  When the hard balls or the fast balls come into your life, your diligence will not rise up and meet it rather it is your spirit.  You can cop a bad attitude or you can choose to be more relaxed and soft.  I totally got it.

I was a bit concerned because diligence is such a good word and such a good characteristic to have.  I am tenacious and I think it is a kin to persistence.  However, if you can keep love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control (Galatians 5:16-22) on the front lines then it makes room for the diligence and tenacity to cover the rear guard.

I've been whispering under my breath that a gentle spirit comes before diligence to keep reminding myself when the boss gets a bit feisty.  My prayer for my Dad during this time is for his spirit to reflect the Fruit of the Spirit along with that heaviness on his heart to go away...

Dolphin Tale

"Dolphin Tale" is wonderful story and a 9.5 for me.  It is a great mix of laughter and I must admit a smidgen of tears.  If you like an underdog story like me, this is for you.

I did go to this movie with a heavy heart.  I had just heard that a dear young lady that I had been praying for is finished with cancer treatments and nothing more can be done.  Her wish is to swim with the dolphins before she goes home to see Jesus.  I haven't met this girl but her smile is warm and irresistible.  So I was a bit preoccupied.

Good ol' Rufus just about steals the show from Winter, the dolphin.  Who is Rufus?  A pelican who loves mischief and will make you laugh.

So what is this story about?  It is about dealing with loss... and rising above it to smile again.

You will have a choice to see it in 2D or 3D.  I prefer 2D and why would you have to see it in 3D?  It is a story and it enough for me.

spirit before diligence ...

I was in a terrible state of mind.  The backlog of work and the cantankerous computer was weighing on my thoughts as I felt my world was sliding down the drain.  I was all excited with the new system update because I could do it.  I wasn't afraid.  I wanted to let it rip.  I had a week's work to put in the system because the higher ups didn't shut down production even with a shaky economy.  I would have done things differently so my employees could be more successful and happy.  Opps, I'm the employee not the boss so I had to work with what was given.  Last week I felt that this new update was like having a bright red shiny car with no engine.  The desk that I like leaving clean was messy with things not done.  Requests were filling up my conscious.  Would I ever catch up?  Would I ever be on top and ahead of the game so that the nagging would stop?

Needless, to say this gentle quiet spirit that dislikes drama felt the fire kicking up to a full roar.  It showed too.  Not good at all.  It has taken a long time to have this calm and here I was feeling the friction between the boss and me.  I was coming home mad at myself.  I knew better and yet I was letting this get to me.  I know that this drama would not matter in Eternity only how I handled myself would.

Yesterday I did catch up for the most part.  Today I feel even better.  I am back to the gentle quiet spirit. I hate having learned the long tough way and feel I like I have fallen backwards.  I think I discovered something.  Chuck Swindoll has been talking about Daniel yesterday and today.  Swindoll said something that really got me to thinking about my spirit and how my boss is seeing me.

I work for a very challenging female boss.  Her basic demeanor is gruff.  A lot of times she shoots from the hip and comes off in an accusing manner.  She can be abusive even though I am sure she doesn't mean to be.  I tried to get away from her and was able to work in another department for awhile until the economy tanked and I was let go.  In order to have a job I had to work for her.  I was hoping for a temporary time of it but it doesn't look like there will be any way of escape.  I have come to terms with it all by the language of thanksgiving.  When I thanked God for the job I hated and for the boss that was making the me seethe, then God gave me a calm.

So what did Swindoll say that got me to thinking about these past two weeks?  "The employer will notice your spirit before he will notice your diligence."  (Chuck Swindoll on Daniel's behavior)  I had to think about this and I still am.  See, I notice if I can stay even keel and calm and not respond negatively to the terse words the boss flings about like free candy thrown at the local fair parade, she doesn't get mad at me and let lose.  I think that just might be the spirit Chuck was talking about.  I don't understand why diligence would be second to spirit but I know when I pose this question to God, He comes with epiphanies and lessons to get excited about learning it.
（*＾〜＾*）

'precautious'

My life is a bit chaotic all because they updated the operating system that my work is using.  I have no fear when it comes to computers so that isn't the problem.  I do fear the boss.  I am under such a backlog that drives me insane.  So to keep my tiny nose just above the rushing water all around me, I keep my precious nose pointed towards anything that buoy's my sorry backside.  Last Wednesday it was the beautiful dusky sunset that my Heavenly Father gave me after the computer and the rainy dash to the stores.  This Wednesday morning it came in the form of the love or silliness of words.

I have started to catch up on news and such from DownUnder because the RadioAlarm App on my iPod has made it easy to stay tuned in to my friend's world.  I happened upon this little show called Adventures in English with Sue Belinda Meehan.  If I can't listen to it because it is early morning for me, I will catch it later online.  I get a kick out how fun it makes English and it helps that I am a bit partial.

Do you know what 'to poodle' means?  It is two words put together - putter and tootle.

put•ter (Brit. pot•ter) verb
occupy oneself in a desultory but pleasant manner, doing a number of small tasks or not concentrating on anything particular : late nights is the best time of the day to putter around the craft room.
• [with adverbial of direction] move or go in a casual, unhurried way : the duck putters on the surface of the pond.


too•tle verb  (I thought Sue Belinda said this word came from England too)
[intrans.] informal go or travel in a leisurely way : they were tootling along the coast.


Sue Belinda said 'to poodle' has origins from England.  I think her mother would use the term a lot.  This is the first time I have heard it used this way.  I think it is quite enjoyable!  I now have three fun words that are related and I shall have a ball using them.

One of the questions posed to Sue Belinda had a running theme through out the hour.  Of course us bad yanks just messed up the language.  ARgh!  So is precautious a word?  The answer was no!  It is doubling up on a word.  If you are already cautious, how can you be cautious beforehand?  Ok, understood.  If you write the word, spell check says it isn't a word but it is in the American Dictionaries especially the older ones.  The newer dictionaries are moving away from them.  I did get out of my nice comfy bed to see if my dictionary had it.  It sure did.  I kept thinking about the word.  It is a bit weird on the tongue but I think I have heard it used in everyday language.  I know I have heard precaution and precautionary before and a lot.  I fired off a tweet but they didn't respond.  It was a hoot.  I think I will try to pay more attention to those silly words.

The other intriguing conversation was this blind man who was teaching young blind children a computer language program.  He was using a program from America and the kids were having a hard time spelling words because of the American accent.  My ears perked and my eyes rolled as a Yank hearing Aussies yack on about how they use 'r' and 'shaw' sounds as extras where in America we just pronounce the words with no extra sounds.  I am thinking how hard spelling must be in Australia with all those extra sounds that are not in the word.  They were making it sound that their extra sounds was the best and there should be no problems with spelling.  Did you know that Aussies pronounce calf with a 'r' in it?

Anyways I latched on what a delight it was to learn about English and the nuances that come from England, Australia, and America.  I love words.  I love learning.  This was a treat and a thanksgiving to carry with me though the stressful days I have been having.

One last interesting tidbit:
English is the most spoken second language.

Welcome Riley Jane

By the light of the oil lamp Jessica nursed baby Shalom.  The flickering flames streaked her hair in light and dark.  It cast shadows across her profile as she smiled tenderly down at him, and illuminated her bare shoulder and the top of his downy head.  She saw me watching and smiled.  "You never know," she said.
"What?"
"How much God loves you until you have one of these of your own.  Then you begin to understand."
~a conversation between two sisters, Jessica and Loralei in Brock and Bodie Thorne's book "The Gathering Storm."

I have been praying for a young mother and for the little girl that made her arrive afternoon today this very thing.  Baby Riley has made safe passage into this world and I am praying that her young mother and young father would be sooooo moved to be overwhelmed by the miracle of life and to seek out the Author of Life.

I received the welcomed news from baby Riley's grandfather.  I could just picture this 6'4" man holding this tiny bundle of 7lbs 12oz much like my own father and grandfather held the baby me so long ago.  There is a sense of time stopping and the an awe of something precious that tugs at the heart making everything still.  

"I was holding her most of the evening.  Riley fell asleep on my chest for a couple of hours."


oh!!!!!!!!!!

churlish

I enjoy a good word when I hear one.   The other day I heard this one and I had to indulge myself in a bit of word candy.

The word was used about Abigail's husband, Nabal who was churlish.  The use was a big give away and has a negative meaning.  I sure wouldn't want that label.  What I like about this word is the way it comes out over the tongue.

I was listening to Sue-Belinda/Adventures in English on 612 Brisbane.  She said that spelling needs to be taught in five ways.
1.  the way it looks
2.  the way it sounds
3.  the way it feels as you write it
4.  word family - what other words are related to it
5.  memory tricks

If I don't pay attention to the way it looks, the 'h' would hide and I would see curl and say it that way.  Opps!  I love the way it sounds and you really can push out the 'ch' and 'r' which makes it sound rude like its meaning.  I can hear the sneer.

churl  noun.  \ˈchər(-ə)l\   rude person
Churl used to mean an ordinary man opposed to royalty.


churlish adj. \ˈchər-lish\ rude


A memory trick for me almost sounds like vomit.  Instead of hurling how about 'churling'.  Ok, I know that isn't a word but it should be.  


Hope you like this word as much as I have!!!!

Call Upon Me

I am quite frustrated that the NYC mayor has decided to keep all religions out the 911 10th Anniversary Reflection Memorial. I do not mind all the religions part but the ultimate COST is the taking out of God and having a personal relationship with the Almighty in a great time of need.

Who better than God to call on when fire and destruction are licking at your heels? Why take Him out of the equation when He still can be found? What a disservice to our founding fathers and those who ran through the man made fire and hell here on earth and straight into the Mighty Arms of God because they had a personal relationship with the God of Salvation?

"For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You." Psalm 86:5

"Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.h Psalm 50:15

"The Lord is near to all who call upon Him, To all who call upon Him in truth." Psalm 145:18

"As for me, I will call upon God, And the Lord shall save me." Psalm 55:16

"Because He has inclined His ear to me, Therefore I will call upon Him as long as I live." Psalm 116:2

"He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him." Psalm 91:15

"Seek the Lord while He may be found, Call upon Him while He is near." Isaiah 55:6

What a sad day it is when we remember the tragic day but refuse to remember the God Most High with our trust and obedience.

"The Lord also will be a refuge for the oppressed, A refuge in times of trouble. And those who know Your name will put their trust in You; For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You." Psalm 9:9&10

what a way to go!

Whew!  All the 911 stuff brings up a lot of feelings.  A question has come to mind as I hear the stories all over again.  If I had a hubby who called me to tell me good bye before he met the Lord, what would I say?

The answer comes quickly.  Psalms 23 seems top on everyone's list but for me it would be Psalms 100.  This particular Psalms gives such strength and gives you something constructive to do when chaos is raining down all around you and when you feel the fires heat bear down your neck and when you feel the foundations give way .....

Psalms 100
Make a joyful shout to the Lord, all you lands.

The battle is the Lord's.  What is a joyful shout but a battle cry?  

Serve the Lord with gladness;

... even in difficult times, even in a blaze of fire, even when you storm the terrorist in a plane headed for the White House, even if you are all alone gasping for the next breath of air,...

come before His Presence with singing.

Singing changes your brain for the better even if all you can get out is a few whimpering notes... He hears you.  He is with you.  He is singing over you.  Can't you hear Him singing?

Know that the Lord, He is God; it is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;
we are His people and the sheep of His pasture.

We were made by His Hand and He has plans for us.  We are weak.  He is strong.  He is our Hope and all we have to do is trust and obey Him.  What a Great Shepherd He is.  We are NEVER EVER FORSAKEN!  Keep marching onward! 

Enter into His Gates with Thanksgiving, and into His Courts with Praise, be thankful to Him, and bless His Holy Name.

If is time to go on into Glory what better way to do so than with thanksgiving when meeting God face to face.  If is time to stay here and come before Him in prayer and all is taken from my hand, it is His plan not my own and I will come before Him and thank Him for what I did have and will wait upon the Lord for what is and is to come.

For the Lord is good; His Mercy is everlasting, and His Truth endures to all generations.

Yes, the kids will know not only their earthy father but their Heavenly Father as well.  God is both Protector and Provider.  We shall meet again.  I have the memories.  We serve and love the One True God.  Those who come behind us will know of our love for each other but more importantly for our Lord and Master.

The visuals are overloading my mind as I step into the 'shoes'.  I am sure the emotions would be raw and the cracks would be in my voice but what strength I find in Psalms 100 and would want to give it out to my loved ones whether or not it was me facing the my final (finest) hours or it was my loves ones.  

O to enter HIS GATES a shouting!!!!!  with all the JOY within me bursting out of all my seams!  What a way to go!!!!  

There Is a Mystery in Human Hearts

There is a mystery in human hearts,
And though we be encircled by a host
Of those who love us well and are beloved,
To every one of us, from time to time,
There comes a sense of utter loneliness.
Our dearest friend is 'stranger' to our joy,
And cannot realize our bitterness.
"There is no one who really understands,
No one to enter in all I feel";
Such is the cry of each of us in turn
We wander in a 'solitary way.'
No matter what or where our lot may be,
Each heart, mysterious even to itself,
Must live its inner life in solitude.
And would you know the reason why this is?
It is because the Lord desires our love,
In every heart He wishes to be first,
He therefore keeps the secret key Himself,
To open all its chambers and to bless
With perfect sympathy and holy peace,
Each solitary soul which comes to Him.
And when beneath some heavy cross you faint,
And say, "I cannot bear this load alone," you say the truth.
God made it purposely
So heavy that you must return to Him,
The bitter grief, which 'no one understands,'
Conveys a secret message from the King,
Entreating you to come to Him again.
You cannot come too often or too near.
The God of Mercy is infinite in grace,
His Presence satisfies the longing soul
And those who walk with Him from day to day
Can never have 'a solitary way.'
~author unknown


I groin heavily in my solitary way.  There is something distinctive about presence especially when it someone captures your mind, heart and soul.  When that presence is gone for too many days, an undertow pulls the heart down.  What a comfort that there is a PRESENCE that is bigger than any other.  What fullness of JOY.  What a pleasure to bask in His Smile and to have His Arms enfold me close.  {joyful sigh}  Psalms 16:11

keep the faith ...

Our new church of a year has celebrated its 175th birthday yesterday.  Hearing all the cool history was great and seeing it was cool.  This was back before Abraham Lincoln was known.  There was a 200 year old Bible from one of the members that was written in Old English.  WOW!!  As I was taking it all in a whisper kept calling me so much so that I had to tell it here.

~~~ Huge photos of yesteryear blown up huge on either side of me on walls.  The eyes are drawing me in and I am trying to hear what they are trying to say to me. Can you hear what they are saying?  Could it be the same thing the early church said and echos through the channels of history?
"Keep the faaaaaaith....  Keeeeep the faaaaaaith ..... keeeeeep the faith..... KEEP THE FAITH! Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap a harvest if we faint not. " Galatians 6:9 ~~~

I know a bit "Dead Poet's Society" but that was what I was hearing inside my head.  Matthew 24 has been on my mind lately.  All around me I see the Love growing cold and it makes me shiver inside.  I don't know how are young are going to survive!

Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold,  but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved.  Matthew 24:12&13


What a tall order in these days but I must keep the faith.  I must keep the love.  I must keep the gratitude.  I want that crown of JOY.  I want those behind me to see His Path.... and want His Love for themselves....

presence ...

"Thy Presence is fullness of Joy."

When that special someone walks into the room, you feel like your insides are inside out beaming.  A twinkle flashes in your eyes.  A smile rests upon your lips.  After the flutter a peaceful calm overtakes your beating heart.  Everything is alright.

When the presence is gone for awhile, you begin to wilt and fade.  Life is harder.  Choices make no sense.  The feet begin to drag.  The eyes begin to weep.  

Today I knew that work was going to be a bit crazy and for some reason I am feeling a bit soft.  I think it is the stage of life I am going through and the allergies I am trying to get through this hot miserable summer make me extra tired and frustrated.  I am doing pretty good yet I feel a fragile crack could surface.  

I have a special someone that makes me feel full and 'purry' (made up word!) like a cat with a tummy full of milk.  I like the hearing him laugh through the email.  I enjoy him.  I love his presence.  He is a bit out of pocket at the moment but I don't want that add to the drag I am feeling.

I kept whispering "Thy Presence is fullness of JOY" ~ Psalms 16:11.  I needed God today.  At nighttime I feel His Comfort when I remember that He will never leave me nor forsake me.  I will curl up under the covers and fall asleep assured of His Faithfulness every night. ~ Psalms 92:2  That is good for evening but I wanted to feel that glow of LovingKindness come walking through the door.  I want that Hello and that Hand in my hand.  I want His Mighty Arms around me.  That is why I am so thankful for the Most High.  Morning and evening He is Ever near.  I need to remember to greet Him with open arms every morning and pull Him close every evening.  

Thank You for loving me and keeping me, oh My Savior!

It is good to give thanks to the Lord,

and to sing praises to Your Name, O Most High;

To declare Your LovingKindness in the morning,

and Your Faithfulness every night.

~ Psalms 92:1&2


You have made known to me the path of life;
You will fill me with JOY in Your Presence,
with Eternal Pleasures at Your Right Hand.
~Psalms 16:11