twilight ...

The niece has read the Twilight series and I asked some questions but they could have been better questions.  The questions are for me to understand the power these books have over girls and to see the thought process of my niece.  An aunt has the ability to be a Watchman over the kids in a different way than parents.  {I am still learning!}

 

I remember back to my college English professor and a discussion we had over literature and how to deal with our Christian beliefs and values in a secular world.  I do believe I am going to have to break down and read the Twilight series and forget the notion that ‘what you read is what you are’.  (It feels like going grocery shopping and having people make their assumptions by what you buy.)  Argh!

 

The author was having trouble sleeping and had young.  From a dream came this vivid scene, where Edward reveals to Bella his true nature.  It was so powerful that she had to finish the story.  She was obsessed and would be up all hours writing.  It was an escape for her.

 

I can’t help but notice the draw it has on the girls especially.  Just from the first movie, I could feel the draw.  Even if there is nothing dark and evil, it is a good way to talk to my niece about girl boy relationships. 

 

Maybe it is nothing but when the niece said that she often thinks about the story and feels like she is Bella, I believe I need to see if I can dig into my niece’s world a bit to make sure she doesn’t lose sight of the Sure Foundation.  :::Note to self::: Must do it in a real cool aunt kind of way! 

 

 

Remember Me ..

I am going to have to rate this movie a very high 10 even though there is sick violence, sex, bad words, and a very dirty apartment and bathroom. This movie is a very mature movie. Sadly, it is the immature that need this wake up call.

I am a very sensitive person and all my life I have had to deal with not having friends when I was a little girl and then as a teen and an adult, having friends up and leave. This movie dealt very strongly with how we treat people, what we have to offer to others, and then when loss occurs, what happens and what we should do to counter that loss.

The review I had heard about this movie was that it has reference to September 11th and that it was just over the top for the message it was conveying to the point that it was offensive. (wish I could remember the exact words used) This review wasn't adding up to the previews but I was a bit concerned. Well, it wasn't offensive. It was unexpected but being super sensitive about relationships and the loss, the use of 911 was very appropriate. However, I still don't think the message will get through to some if not most.

The movie was very respectful about the 911 scene. You did not see it but you know just what happened. That needs to be commended. Yes, this is a bit dark but in the end the father finally turns around and the son is happy. The lesson is learned and changes are happening.

My mom stayed awake through it because she was in rapt attention. I think her favorite part about the movie was the relationship between the brother and his sister. They are about 6 years apart (reflective of my mom and her brother). Why wouldn't this brother be protective and endearing towards his younger sister after having lost an older brother about 6 years older than him? He had a role model. This young man is a sensitive sort and he is trying to make sense of his loss and acts out because his family especially his father just doesn't seem to get it.

I could go on and on ... I am a thinker and an English Major to boot. I totally dig the deep stuff and I could go round and round pulling juicy gems out and looking at them against the lamp.

I feel strongly that believers will be judged on the relationships kept, discarded, lost, and ignored. I know I have some relationships in my past that I am ashamed of my actions or inaction..... I feel helpless sometimes. I hold on so tightly when I have a real good one .... while at other times I just let them fade ....

{Above his photo is the quote 'Scars are proof of triumph. Let the wounded Jesus Christ bless and heal your wounds.' Now tucked in the lower part of the frame is the movie ticket stub ... Remember me.... does he think of me? Scars still are tender and always will be ...

"Fingers don't fade from the people we touch."
~ Remember Me
-----

Wow! I am really charged by this movie. It feels good to make the decision to not let the bosses bad mood effect me. Life is way to short!

You could watch this movie and see no hope but as a believer I know a Sure Foundation. I know the Way, the Truth, and the Light. It is time to spread it. Hear this hymn on the radio and thought it perfect...

Turn your eyes on Jesus

O soul, are you weary and troubled?
No light in the darkness you see?
There’s a light for a look at the Savior,
And life more abundant and free!

Refrain

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.

Through death into life everlasting
He passed, and we follow Him there;
Over us sin no more hath dominion—
For more than conquerors we are!

Refrain

His Word shall not fail you—He promised;
Believe Him, and all will be well:
Then go to a world that is dying,
His perfect salvation to tell!

Refrain

left my suitcase in Brizzy...

I learned today that ‘to leave your suitcase Berlin’ is a German expression for having emotional and heart ties to a certain place.  I like this expression for I have left my heart in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia.   No I have never visited the place but I got to know someone from there and if I should be so fortunate to travel Downunder I would have to go to Brisbane.  The tourist haunts would most definitely come second to this town and community.  I want to soak up the ambiance of the place for pieces of my heart are on a different shore …

 

Today blogs help me to do some virtual travel and my suitcase over there gets bigger and bigger!  Funny how Brizzy has become my town in my own crazy way.  Forget the Sydney Harbor for I would rather visit the Finder Keeper Markets, RiverFire fireworks, Ekka … etc.  I would also have to check out every day life and just the every day stores because I want that experience and not just the show you get if you are a tourist.  Silly, I know but I want to visit their Target and their Aldi’s!  Sure I would mind to dip my toe in the ocean there but I did say I wanted an everyday experience didn’t I?

 

{sighs & smiles}

giving up why ...

I have been ignored and deserted.  “The lot is casted into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord.” (prov 16:33)  Knowing WHY he left will NOT heal up the wounds I have been carrying because I have left it up to a human.  Only the wounded Jesus Christ will bless and heal up all my wounds.  ‘Scars are the proof of triumph.’ (Pastor Lutzer)  Time to give up knowing why.

give me more beauty!!!

I confess I have a fetish for anything beautiful. I treasure beautiful words and beautiful pictures the most. I am getting real bad about this!

I can't stand the co-workers continual storytelling. Her storytelling is usually about something bad. I can't stand old grumpy people either where everything is bad. I can't stand the continual news drainage on all day and night tv. (my ears had to deal with a grumpy couple and news tv for four hours while waiting for my jeep) I just want to pluck my brains and eardrums out through the nose with a tweezer! I tried to read God's Word but there was sooooo much noise (I can't stand unnecessary noise! never have. never will!) and the wait was soooo long, that it was verrrrrry hard. I even tried to come up with thank You's but that was impossible. It didn't help that I was getting a headache.

It was good to fill my eyes on beautiful pictures in the magazines at the stores. I love the visual feast. The afternoon of shopping gave way for thanking God for some good things for the day.

I have a problem with the negatives. I used to be in that place and don't want to go back. Sometimes it can be a real fight. Now that I am most HA free and have a handle on God's JOY, why waste my time on the negatives? That isn't me anymore. It isn't a habit I will return to but it is more like a food allergy. I know what makes me sick so I avoid it.

love yourself by reading the Word ...

A request came for a painted suggestion box plus an invitation to a Bible study. This invitation came at the right time and I went. I don't ever think I will find a church in today's climate. Maybe unconventional is more my style. I am shy but I just did this without thinking so as to not over think! When I walked in I felt like I was the odd person out like always but I am going to stick this one out. I want this. I need an avenue outward.

The topic was about 'Loving You'. As I looked around and took in the message, I wondered if the fellow woman where coming up empty. Their baskets are full - the have husbands and kids but maybe they are coming drained of all they are. Here I am with my empty basket - no hubs, no kids. All my energy and focus has been spent on me. It could look selfish but I have been making myself toe the line. I am a seeker, a keeper, and a learner. I may be a slow learner but none the less, I am always moving even if it is tiny steps. Woman are suppose to have a lot of words and I suppose I do but it is more inwards. Hmmm, if you were a mouse in my house you would say I was talking to myself which I do but I am doing a lot of vocal talking to God. (Blogging helps use up my words!) The short of it is that I don't think I have a problem of loving myself. Now I am not confident of my looks or myself at times. My relationship with my hair is a love hate one. So where did I end up loving myself?

I wasn't loving myself for a very long time. In the teen years I was trying to have a cheerleader's personality because everyone seemed to think shy is bad. (Wish I could tell them a think or two now!) In the 20's I was trying to be a lovable girl that some man would want. I was studying up on having a good marriage, on how to be a good wife etc. In my 30's God began to show me all about JoY and I gave up on self help books. (They are a sin.) Self help is really thumbing your nose at God and saying you can do it yourself. My 30's had a lot of growing pains but here is where I began to seek ways of putting God's Word in my life by putting special verses on 3x5's so I could mediate on them. Then I was reading a chapter of Proverbs according to the number of the day. And last May I began to read the Bible chronologically through.

'Loving You' isn't about loving myself. It is about loving God. I wish it hadn't taken me so long to love God madly and deeply but now that I have, I am excited and ready to keep this passion on fire and hot. I desire to love Him more and more. It has every thing to do with reading His Word. I can't get enough. Interesting enough the by product is loving myself. I am not perfect and I have a long way to go. I have bad moments and bad days which I fight back by digging into the Word like a soldier digs a trench for protection.

The message at the Bible study made me realize where I am in my life. I have come a ways. I have a long ways to go too. Even though I don't have hubs or ankle biters to mold me, God has cultivated me. I take great comfort in that! Taking my eyes off the message and looking around at the other girls, I am looking forward to new relationships and new encouragement adventures that God has in store ....

journey vs. life sentence ...

Dear Heavenly Father,
As I pray for others and their requests, I have begun to see their struggles as a journey rather than a life sentence. Now if I only would see my own struggles and frustrations as a journey then might Your Light and Joy shine through? A hearty yes, I should say! A journey isn't so bad because once you see it as an adventure with You it makes it exciting rather than bearable! Thank You for the Journeys!!!! As said so well in Deut. 31:8 'You the Lord goes before me and will be with me; You will never leave me nor forsake me.' I will do as You command: I will not be afraid. I will not be discouraged.
always your daughter

Winter Olympics Vancouver 2010

1. loved the olympians marching in and seeing the colorful outfits
2. loved the how the Canadians included every Canadian with the flame and opening ceremony
3. interesting how many Canadians there are imbedded in the US!
4. British Columbia Vancouver 'Come Visit' ads!
5. loved how the floor and the 3D mountain became screens in the opening ceremony
6. loved Wayne Gretzky lighting the flame
7. unique flame!
8. 1st indoor opening for Winter Olympics
9. U.S. 4-man bobsled team wins gold; first since 1948
Steve Holcomb and his "Night Train" squad takes USA to gold
10. Twitter Lists allows you to get closer to the Olympians
11. Chad Hendricks is a Christian
12. loving the snowboard half pipe! so dangerous
13. know Louie Vito from Dancing with the Stars
14. totally love the snowboards red, white, and blue plaid hooded jacket! want one!!!!!
15. learned about Kevin Pearce - hit his head in December in snowboard training run & is recovering
16. liking the 4 person snowboard race... not sure what is was called....
17. always love hockey but goalie Ryan Miller was the topping!!!
18. missing the Winter Olympics but am getting more sleep!

bread bubbles ...

What echoes in my mind when people say something negative to me about me like my hair or when people say something negative about others and harps on it like it is the only string left is “Love builds up.  Knowledge puffs up.” (I Cor. 8:1)  Yesterday I got home with my brain ringing over all the tearing down words I endured.  I am a quiet person and I don’t know how to tell them to shut up.  I feel very chained and deflated.  It takes a lot of hard work to clean out my mental space and to think on things above.  I’ve been singing songs and praying for others just to shut out the noise.  This morning I wrote this verse down on paper and what does my visual side do?  It started to picture this verse.

 

The ‘pea under my mattress’ was knowledge.  Knowledge is suppose to be a good thing.  Proverbs is all about getting Wisdom and Understanding.  I deeply feel this knowledge is different than Proverbs’ Wisdom and Understanding.  I see this knowledge as that juicy morsel about someone that you use and twist as a dagger in their back whether face to face or to others.  Ok, ready for my paraphrase of this verse?

 

Love builds up like brick - strong and fit.

Juicy morsels puffs up like bread bubbles that pop.

 

That is what came to mind and it might need some work but it is definitely something to think about when juicy morsels are on our lips…. Are we building up or popping others?  And maybe when we feel that all we have is popped bread bubbles all over our hearts and brains that to remember we are truly valued and loved in our Heavenly Father’s Hands.

victory in scars?

Last night I was struggling with an old festering wound.  It is about loss and I don’t want to totally give this up.  I don’t want to burn old pictures or letters.  I don’t want to toss old magazines or even the socks.  I don’t want to give up the habits of holding on that I have been doing for the last five years.  I hate late night tears and they were coming.  So I just left my grief at His Feet and turned away to sleep.

 

This morning I was minding my own business and singing to God when Pastor Luzter came on the radio speaking of wounds.  Just what I needed so I jotted down the searing words.  This will be part of my ‘talk back’ so that maybe this wound I hold will heal and I can walk upright again.

 

“Some people never let their wounds heal.

Scars are proof of VICTORY.

Let the wounded Jesus Christ bless and heal your wounds.”

~ Pastor Luzter

Wisdom is a she ...

It stuck me when reading Proverbs 3 that Wisdom is described as she.  The command is that man should get Wisdom not possessions.  A man’s job is to provide and to protect which is a ‘me power’ instead of a God-Power. Possessions show how well he can protect and provide.  So getting Wisdom goes against the grain of man.  Let’s go back to the command.  It says to embrace Wisdom.  Here the picture of a man embracing his woman pops up in my visual mind.  This getting Wisdom should be a love affair!  I have heard from a good marriage where the man describes his wife as the life and the joy and the reason for living.  Proverbs 3 describes Wisdom in these words as well!!!!!  Also take note that God embraces Wisdom as He created the world in 6 days.  The male persona is all about doing and action.  God embracing Wisdom as He created is a perfect example of we are to do.  Man is to embrace Wisdom and then act.  True Wisdom and True Knowledge only comes by seeking her in God’s Word.  Think of this as being married to Wisdom and having a deep and meaningful relationship with her.  Wisdom as a female will tend to your needs.  She will keep you.  She will serve you well.  Wisdom has the best for you.  She welcomes you always. 

 

Wow! Isn’t God such a grand Author?  Ahh, Author and Finisher of our faith….