I am a story collector. I am a story keeper. I like to listen to someone's story. I like to understand what makes them tick, what makes them smile, and what makes them sad. I am emotionally vested. It is treasure in the raw. I have a vast library of stories and as I think stories begin to come together and dots begin to connect and my thoughts enter into new territory. Often these stories are kept within my library for my own pondering but sometimes the story must be told...
I have a co-worker friend whose story has a similar vein as me and my nieces. She once opened up to tell me about her child that she miscarried. I have not experience this in my family sphere when she was telling me. My heart ripped for her as she stated that she often wonders about this child she will never know. Inside my heart I am screaming 'I will see this little one and you too can if you fellow Jesus'. I don't say it aloud. I want her to hear not shut me down. Maybe another time ...
Another story comes by a book. This child is a child with a lot of health problems and does not have many days on earth. As the story unfolds it is how the mother and father cope with the health issues and with not knowing how long they have with this precious little girl. I don't remember the title of the book. Some of the details are foggy. I am thinking the little girl's name started with an A like Angie or Angel. What I do remember well is the 'vision' the mother had. The mother was awake and this dream was of comfort. It was God surrounded with little children and He was telling them that He has parents who wanted a baby and He had a tough assignment. He wanted to see who was up for the challenge. He went through the list. Hands went up but then as the list got harder and harder, the hands weren't going up except for one. This little girl called Angie said she was willing to undergo all of the heath issues and limited days on earth. This is just a paraphrase and I so wish to find that book! But what I remembered most about this was how it comforted the mother to know that God had a purpose for this precious baby as well as for her and her husband. It changed the mother perspective and renewed her weary soul that if Angie could sign up for this hard challenge, she could be up for this challenge as well.
Another baby story comes from Joni Erickson Tada. Again I don't remember all the details but I do remember Joni saying that this mom knew that something was wrong with the baby and the baby wasn't going to live. The mom so determined to give this baby in her womb all her best and to be proud to have carry this baby as many days God would give. I was thinking wow..... to have presence of mind to be joyful and not wallow in grief and loss... I don't think I could do that.
Another story is King David's baby story. He lost a baby. He grieved and morned and prayed over the baby but when the baby died, he washed himself up and morned no more. The people around him wondered at this. King David's reply was that he could not bring the baby back but that he would go unto the baby meaning that when he died he would go unto this baby.
I've squirreled these stories away never knowing if I would ever need them. I am not a mother nor will I ever be one. I do have a mother instinct and vision so maybe some day I could use them....
News! My little brother and wife are having a baby.... lasted all of twelve weeks. The little one was the size of a blueberry. I was still in the process of accepting the idea of another pair of feet pattering around. A new personality to discover and enjoy. Gone. Never to know ... at least not here on this earth. Heaven and eternity though will be ours to know each other ... so hard to wrap my mind around. What comfort can I bring to my brother and his wife? I have these stories.... they are a comfort to me but how do I be a storyteller....?
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