hurt me ...

How do words sting! I am an adult with 3o some years to take the edge off the pain of a raised voice and angered filled words and I still am crushed every time. I was in a numbing pain quiet pain so I was keeping to myself and trying to do my best when sleeping in and reading a book with a warming liquid soothing out my frays. To my wildest shock a man ripped into me. It doesn't matter who was wrong, what matters to me most is playing as a team.

I am sick of others feeling it is alright to attack me and I am suppose to do the right thing and take it. Pretty much I am shocked stiff with eyes in a rage and my voice gone. I cry and talk myself right then my mind goes right back and my heart bleeds. Where can I go? I have no team player. I have no arms to hold me and have no words that soothe my being. Am I that loathsome? Or is the world that petty?

Don't get me wrong. I do have Arms and I do have Heavenly Words. I do have one Awesome Teammate but aren't believers called to love? Where are they?

Dear Heavenly Father,
Junk was brought to the table and again I find myself floundering with the right way to defuse the problem. All I could do was walk away. I probably will have to deal with some of it again tomorrow. I need YOU. How do I fly above it? How do I live exceedingly abundantly beyond? It is not eternal but it sure stings now...

I am glad to come home and sigh. I am glad that food awaits my hungry tummy. I finished an easter egg on my loom and even though I feel numb about it, I hope when I show my mom her excitement will encourage me. Right now I just want to hide me and all my creative things.

It is bedtime and as I close my eyes and myself from all the hurts, I ask for Your Words to cuddle me into Your Presence. You are the Great Shephard and You pull me close. I have only You to answer to and look to. You never fail. Your eyes are always friendly, Your voice always deep and calming...

I love You because You first loved me and pursued me. You called beautiful and beloved. Ahhhhhh, ' whom shall I fear?' Thank You. I knew You only could provide me with comfort. May I curl up in Your Arms and go to sleep ....
~always your fearful little girl

My Girl,
I, even I, am He who comforts you. Who are you to fear man? (Isaiah 51:12) You are a child of the King. You are the girl - your Bridegroom cometh. Keep being beautiful. Keep your smile about you.
~always the King, always the Bridegroom

hurt me no more!